Reliving Shattered Dreams
by Arldetta
Summary: Long awaited sequel to Forsaken and Begotten. Obi-Wan has returned to the Republic after being captured by Togirian Pirates. The Republic trial is over and punishment has been dealt. What will happen next?
1. Nightmare into Nightmare

**Title:** Reliving Shattered Dreams

**Author:** Arldetta

**Disclaimers:** Owning Star Wars would make me incredibly rich and powerful, it would also mean I am now a man with a beard who always wears flannels. I guess it's a good thing I don't own it after all. Beards can be very itchy (so my hubby says.)

**Summary:** This is the sequel to _Forsaken and Begotten_, a story I wrote from 2002-2004, in which Obi-Wan was taken by Togorian Pirates on his way to Bandomeer. Five years later, Obi-Wan returns to civilization where he has faced a Republic trial for his time with the Pirates. This follows shortly after that one ends. So I do suggest you read _Forsaken and Begotten_ first.

**Author's note:** I can't really believe it's been five long years since I finished _Forsaken_. I never meant it to go this long. However, there was much going on in my life and I had little inspiration to continue my epic. Although I will admit it nagged me often to complete my story. And every time I felt the desire to write something would pop up and stop me before I could really get going. It was a struggle and I felt at a loss on how to continue. At the beginning of this year, I vowed to begin posting this story by year's end. I was tired of it floating around in my head and wanted it out. I just didn't know how I was going to do it.

Then from February to April, two important things happened in my life. First, I lost my job. And second I took a class that helped me rearrange my thoughts and goals into a positive and more productive process. And suddenly, my muse returned and I found the words flowing out of me. I have managed to draft a number of chapters, so I am hoping that I will be able to post with minimal interruptions. At this point I am planning to post twice a month on the 15th and the 28th. Wish me luck on keeping to that schedule!

Lastly, I wanted to thank everyone who has reviewed, added me as favourite author, my stories as favourite stories, to C2s, and alerts. The constant reminders that my work has made people happy has meant a great deal to me. And I thank you all very much!! I also wanted to thank you for your patience! Five years is a long time to be waiting on a cliffie. And for that I am sorry! Please accept this long first chapter as a way of apology. Enjoy it! And as always, please review, I love hearing from you!! – Ari :D

- SW – SW – SW -

Chapter 1: Nightmare into Nightmare

_For the light of day that_

_Cannot still the trembling of your heart_

_And the black of night that_

_Does not bring a blanket of comfort_

_Forever shall the nightmares consume you_

Obi-Wan had been there for almost a week and the bruises were no longer visible. It wasn't exactly his fault, although he should have had better control – at least he would have if not for the infernal collar. It was then that he noticed that his hand lingered on the smooth metal that still wrapped his neck. It was an unconscious habit that he only recently became aware of when lost in thought.

At first he hoped that with good behaviour he might convince them to remove it. Regrettably, he supposed his initial entrance did not offer a good enough impression of him. Not that he believed they would have removed the collar anyway. Sometimes, it is that little glimmer of hope that sees one through the darkness.

It was heading into after midday now and he had managed to remain reclusive amongst his fellow inmates even during mid-meal. After everything that had happened recently, he needed time to think and recover. While the Sensory Deprivation Cell did give him solitude, it took everything he had in him not to go insane. With the collar on he just didn't have the full resources he needed to deal with the situation adequately. It had only been a few days since then and he had finally been allowed to rejoin the regular populace - once the Facility Healer cleared him. However, it appeared as though his luck had run out. He felt a sharp jab in his leg.

"Get up, Jedi-boy." The former pirate ignored the dull throb from where the other boy kicked him. Obi-Wan continued to stare off at the small garden fountain. He was perched on a very low partition that sectioned off this area from the rest of the extensive room. This was the closest place in the R&R room that he could find that barely resembled anything close to the Fountain room in the Temple or even the lake by his home on Togoria.

"Come on, Jedi-boy. Get up," the tall boy sneered.

Long ginger bangs hid his lackluster gaze as the corsair sighed. He was hoping to avoid this kind of confrontation, but he should have known it wouldn't be possible. Obi-Wan already heard about this young leader and his little brood at mid-meal. A few of the other 'residents' were talking about their experiences with Kwok's gang and warned everyone around them that was new to Ashua, including Obi. And if he was any judge, he knew that such repetitive banter meant that there was some validity in their comments.

Each one of the group had been in and out of a number of correctional detention centers and were finally placed here in Ashua. That was over a month ago and soon Kwok gathered some followers and became the top dog here. The young man was tall with tanned leathery skin and dirty blonde hair. His eyes as yellow as the sandy planet he was from. All scowls and scars his features were. For many he was a rather imposing figure, which he used to his advantage. Frankly, Obi-Wan wasn't impressed as he had met far worse individuals in his travels. Having nothing else better to do and needing to expend their pent up aggression, Kwok's little gang would terrorize anyone it could.

Unfortunately, Obi-Wan now found himself the object of such attention. Attention he was making an effort to avoid. "What's wrong Jedi-boy? Too good fer us _poc'sers_*? Think yer better than us?" The kid kicked him in the thigh again, much harder this time. Obi-Wan knew he would have to respond or he was going to have to add more bruises to his recently healed body. Another aspect he was seeking to avoid.

Not very interested in the real purpose behind their visit, Obi-Wan felt compelled to correct one thing. "I'm not a Jedi," he said simply. It was amazing how quickly and easily one little thing could get on one's nerves. Moreover, how fast someone could poke at a sore topic, an old wound still bleeding and festering, without even knowing enough to be deemed dangerous. And yet, Kwok did so immediately.

"Don't give me that kron. We heard all about you, Jedi-boy."

"I'm not a Jedi." Obi-Wan answered again, his tone lower and colder than before. The constant jab was just like pouring salt on a fresh wound. With each mention his weary countenance tensed further, slowly stretching his patience thin. _Why can't they just leave me alone?_

A deeper insidious chuckle echoed in his inner ear and he stiffened immediately. _Punishment. Repayment._ That foul baritone hissed. For an instant he wanted to bolt, get as far away as he could from the voice, but he found his path blocked.

"Fine, Jedi-boy," taking his silence for something else, Kwok changed tactics, "if that's the way ya want to be, how 'bout I just call you filthy pirate?"

Glaring up at his antagonist, Obi said, "I don't care what you call me, just leave me alone."

_Alone? Is that _really_ what you want?_ His instinctual need to run and fight and break free increased exponentially. His whole body turned from weary teen to taut and deadly muscle. If he didn't escape soon, he feared what would happen.

Unfortunately, Kwok had no idea what he was getting himself into or the turmoil in his seemingly weak opponent. Taking a step forward he invaded Obi-Wan's space. "And why would I want to do that?"

Dropping his head ever so slightly he allowed russet strands to hide his gaze. Cultured tones became an icy growl. "Because it would be better for all of us if you did."

"Who says?" The lanky teen questioned. Kwok was getting exactly what he wanted out of his prey. The delinquent youth enjoyed taking people from their pedestals and showing them who was really boss in the playground. He just had no concept of what he was really unleashing. Mockingly, Kwok added as he glanced quickly at his posse, "Besides, I'm just here to welcome you to Ashua. I'm just trying to be friendly."

_Don't listen to him. You know what he really wants._

Obi-Wan glanced hard at the blonde through copper bangs. "I doubt that."

The boy laughed and his followers echoed the sound. "Come now, if you get caught fighting, you get sent to SD. From what I heard you only just got out. I don't think you'd want to go back so soon now would you?"

The rational part of Obi-Wan's mind knew his rival's plan. The blonde intimidates by his appearance. If that isn't enough to make one quake in their boots, the number of ugly characters behind him would normally suffice. On the rare occasion that didn't work, subtle to outright threats would be used. And lastly physical force. All this for the simple purpose of proving who was king of the hill.

Such petty needs didn't interest Obi-Wan any more. Once, long ago he had met that kind of mentality head on during his bouts with Bruck. But all that got him was a life of regrets and pain. No. He didn't want to fall into those paltry traps anymore. He needed to concern himself about other things. Not these cowards.

_Cowards. Yes. Show them what fear is. Show them what power is. You know you can do it._

_No! I won't. You don't own me any more._

_Are you so sure, Bauudi? If you truly believed that, then why am I still here? Why do I still haunt you? _

_The collar…_ he argued weakly.

_Liar! I was always here. Always in your mind. You just managed to lock me away for a while. The collar just gave me the means of breaking free of the prison you put me in. Now I'm free. Free to rule you once again!_

_No! Please. Just stop. stop._

_You can't stop me now any more than you could in that room. All you had was me. I own you! _

"No! Leave me alone!" He shouted as he sprang up from the bump of a wall. His only desire was to run. Suddenly, there were hands on his chest pushing him back, denying him his only wish.

"Who says you can go?" Kwok demanded, enjoying the fact he had finally managed to rile his prey.

Obi-Wan just knocked the boy's hands away from him. "I'm leaving," he announced in a voice that brooked no room for argument. Stepping aside, he only managed two steps when more hands hindered his departure. They weren't there long as battle instincts kicked in and he soon heard cries and shouts of pain around him. Within moments he had half the group lying on the ground grabbing at broken and twisted limbs. He was about to leave when he heard someone shout behind him.

"Stop, Jedi-boy and face me!" Obi-Wan paused only slightly before continuing. "Don't think yer getting' away with this!" With an angered cry, Kwok lunged for his prey and rammed into Obi-Wan's side, crashing them both to the ground.

Obi-Wan struggled against the weight above him. Throwing an elbow back he heard the satisfying sound of a gasp and the weight fall off. He managed to twist around and get to his knees by the time his opponent recovered. Once again the firm figure of Kwok collided with him. Arms and legs battled for domination.

_That's it, fight for me._

"No!" He ground out between gulps of air. "Not again."

_Always! Forever, you will do my bidding. Mine, Bauudi, mine!_

A shout of frustration rang out around them. A beacon for others to follow. Soon a gathering of delinquents built the walls for an arena. The crowd goading on two combatants - fighting for supremacy. Some hoping the underdog could usurp their tormentor. Others encouraging their leader to victory. Kwok had renewed vigor to win now. Diving back into the fight, he swung at his prey.

Lost in his own struggle, Obi-Wan had higher stakes than pride to deal with. His frail sanity was on the verge of collapse. His body only mirrored the desperation of his mind. _No, I can't. I'm a Jedi._ He thought frantically.

_Were. You _were_ a Jedi. Now you're mine. My bauudi. _

_no._

_And if you want to live, you'll do what I want. Now fight. Fight or you will face a punishment worse than death._

_no, _he begged. He could feel the tears stinging his eyes. If only he could find a way to escape.

Meanwhile, beyond the trappings of his mind he struggled with his current nemesis. As he fought all he could see was sandy blonde hair swaying in his face, feel the ground beneath him, and the onlookers cheering them on. The shouts and screams echoed in his ears, merging with memory. Taking him to a time where the Beast lived outside his mind. A time when he was a slip of a boy caught in a dark and dangerous world clinging to the hope of life. Forced into a status that was even below slavery.

With a surge of energy he pushed the weight off him once again then rolled to the side. A different time, a different place. Collecting himself, he stared at the image of a boy not much older than himself with sandy blonde hair. The gaunt lanky figure bore scars of previous battles. He wondered if he would end up looking the same.

His thoughts were disrupted as the boy charged him. He easily sidestepped out of the way and the boy ran past him. The thrum of the crowd rose momentarily. The frustrated boy swung around and charged again. He shouted as he ran, "Fight me, damn it!"

"I won't. I can't." He said evading the second charge. But the boy anticipated his move and spun with a vicious kick to the chest. Young Obi-Wan fell back with a huff. His opponent automatically pounced on the downed figure and began swinging.

"Fight. If you don't fight, we _both_ get punished. So Fight, damn it! Ahhh!!!" The other boy screamed as he locked both hands above his head preparing to hammer the figure beneath him.

Obi-Wan saw the blow and immediately shifted his weight, throwing his captor off him. But the boy was undeterred. He rolled and sprung back to his feet. Lunge, duck, swing, dodge – they fought. Neither gaining nor losing ground. His opponent lacked training but garnered enough experience to be a worthy foe. Whereas, Obi-Wan had training but had little experience, still he knew that if he truly wanted he could end this fight quickly. He fought defensively not wanting to hurt this boy. His rival was probably thrust into this life just like he was. If he could only figure a way out for both of them.

Suddenly, there was a jolt of fire that ripped through his body. He crashed to the ground trying to overcome the pain. After he took a number of deep gulping breaths he peeked out through a squinted gaze and saw the other boy lying in a similar position. Apparently they both received the jolt. An unfamiliar and cold voice echoed over the room. "This is your only warning. We are paying for a fight. Now you will fight or face punishment and death."

Slowly, the pair recovered, getting up on their feet again. Two tired gazes locked, each one trying to determine their next move when a buzzer sounded. Glancing around, they sought out the source. Finally, they found it. Off to one side a small whole opened up and a long thin pole rose up. Both stared at it curiously until it finally dawned on them what it was – a weapon. A mad dash was made to procure the pike.

The other boy, having been a little closer and faster, grabbed it and immediately spun around to attack Obi-Wan. The former initiate managed to duck and miss it by a hair's breath. Tucking into a ball, the would-be-Jedi rolled behind the boy and kicked out. The unexpected retaliation did the trick and the boy found himself flat on his back. The cheers from the crowd swelled. Loose once more the pike rolled away. Automatically, Obi-Wan scrambled over and grabbed it. Arms wrapped around his waist and pulled him back down. The scuffle lasted moments only.

Separating, the pair stood staring at each other. Obi-Wan tightened and relaxed his grip on the smooth pole. Now that he had the weapon he didn't want to continue the fight. All during his training, they emphasized disarming the opponent and then opening up negotiations. But what is there to negotiate now? This isn't a land dispute or trade rights or anything. The boy he was pitted against didn't have a grievance with him per se, maybe against his owner or whoever forced him into this life but that's it. This wasn't even like his bouts with Bruck or for bragging rights. They had been put here specifically to fight to the death for the enjoyment of others.

His thoughts were interrupted by a cry from the boy as he charged him, crashing them back to the ground. However, this time while they struggled, the boy hissed in his ear, "I will not be punished for you. If you don't fight I will kill you now." And the intensity of his punches and jabs strengthened.

But Obi-Wan didn't want to die. Not yet. There was still a chance he could go home. All he had to do was figure out a way to escape. If he got in touch with the Council they might send someone to get him. Facing only two options – fight or die – he finally gave himself fully to the former. It was the show the crowd had been waiting for. He pushed the boy off and got to his feet. Another buzzer sounded and this time a vibrowhip came out. The lanky boy snatched it up and smiled. Unfurling it, he lashed out with confidence. Obi could tell immediately that the boy knew how to wield this particular device.

After that their movements were fast and deliberate. Victory their goal. As the whip flew threw the air, the staff spun. Deflecting each other's blows, the fight turned into an intricate dance. A prelude to death. Beauty within a gruesome tango. Gradually the enthusiasm built to crescendo.

Until at last both combatants tired. The boy's movements were clumsy now, leaving openings more often. The crowd was calling for an end. To finish this contest and give them blood.

And as simple as that, the fight ended – at least for Obi-Wan. Exhausted and wanting an end himself, the blonde boy struck out with his whip, wrapping it around the middle of Obi-Wan's pike. Easily Obi-Wan yanked and knocked him off his feet. The boy went down with a grunt and lay there. Following through with the motion, Obi-Wan spun and stopped with the tip of his staff millimeters from the other boy's neck. Standing there, the former Jedi waited for the match to be called. To his dismay nothing happened. The crowd called for death and no one was curbing such desire. The boy had managed to roll onto his back now, brown and gold stripe eyes begged for something that Obi-Wan could not fathom. Taking in a shaky breath, the scared and lanky boy pleaded, "Finish me now. Do it!"

"I can't." Young Obi-Wan could not believe what he was hearing. There was fear in the other boy's eyes and a tremor in his voice. Still he could not fully comprehend it all. His Jedi-trained mind could only see a child like himself pleading for death. It was wrong, so incredibly wrong.

Yet not long ago he would not have lamented joining the Force - if not for Tuuvu. The Togorian had genuinely cared for Obi-Wan helping to revive him enough to endure Drrov's demonic demeanor. The First mate had shown him that even the smallest glimmer of hope is enough to keep the spirit alive. And that was why he was here now. Not that he wanted to fight but because there is the hope of escape, the hope of finding a way out of this and going home. The hope that somehow he could still be a Jedi despite everything that has happened. And right now, the hope that both of them could get out of this alive.

The boy's begging broke his thoughts, "Please, kill me."

"I can't!" He said as he threw away his weapon and sank to his knees. The adrenaline draining away along with the last of his strength. The thought of ending another's life terrified him.

At last, the overseer of these fights spoke. "The terms of this match have been set. It is not over until one of you is dead."

The blonde boy desperately reached out and grabbed at Obi-Wan. "Kill me. You must kill me. Do it now. Quickly, before it's too late."

Shaking his head, he turned up to the voice. "I will not take another's life. He has fought for your enjoyment."

"What are you doing? You're going to get us punished!"

But Obi-Wan ignored his protests. "He has been a worthy opponent, giving you your money's worth."

"Stop it! They don't care about that. All they want is blood, so give it to them!"

"He should be allowed to live."

"No. I can't live like this anymore. Kill me!"

"Please, show mercy." Obi-Wan stared up, scanning the crowd for any indication that his plea may be answered. Even the boy clutching at him stopped unsure of what was to come.

There was a pause. The crowd was silent as it also awaited the decision. Seconds seemed like hours to the two weary fighters, but that was all that passed by the time the overseer spoke again. "One must die." Doors on the side of the arena opened. The lanky boy cowered back, panic written across his face. "Since neither is willing to finish, both will be punished with the inferior's death following."

Obi-Wan was shaking his head unbelieving that they would kill a child. His gaze dropped to the blonde boy, whose face had suddenly transformed from terrified to enraged hate. And it was all directed at him. He fell back under such loathing.

"Damn you!" The boy shouted. "Why couldn't you have just killed me?" A string of words followed that Obi-Wan couldn't understand, yet the meaning of which was all too clear. A curse filled with every ounce of hatred the boy could muster.

Desperately, Obi-Wan wanted to beg forgiveness. He never wanted this to happen. But he never got the chance. Pain erupted throughout his entire body. Time lost all meaning in such agony and everything seemed to happen in a blur. The only clear memories he had were the tears running down his face and the echo of tormented screams in his ears. And eventually, the blonde boy's last gurgling sound before death finally – thankfully – claimed and freed him.

Regret would haunt the former initiate for years to come. So many regrets, the disheartening decisions that led him down this path of pain. But the one that would stick out most for some time to come, was the fact that he never knew the boy's name.

_Why does that matter? He was no one._ His constant tormentor laughed.

_It matters to me! He has a right to be remembered. He was someone's child once. Just like I was. It wasn't fair that his life ended so horribly._

_A meaningless life._

_It was not meaningless. _

_How would you know? You knew nothing about him._

_That's irrelevant. No life is ever meaningless. The Force guides us all._

Another insidious chuckle filled his ears. _If that is so, then that means that _your_ Force gave you to me. Wanted me to torture you. The Force wanted your pain!_

_No! That's not true!_

_Yes, it is. It wanted your Jedi to abandon you. It put you on that ship for me to take you and make you mine. It handed you over to me for me to do with you what I please. It knew who I was and yet your Force gave you over easily. It wanted you punished. _

_No! Please, Force, don't let it be true!_

_Your Pain. Your anguish. Your tears. Your Screams!_

Desperately, he tried to shut out the voice. His mind a twisted jumble of confused thoughts and emotions. Part of him wanted to deny it all. Everything in his upbringing spoke of a Force that was good and kind. But the doubts in his mind argued asking for a better explanation for all that he had suffered. And the worst part was that he couldn't find one. He shouted out his frustrations, which only seemed to incite the voice.

_Yes, my Bauudi. Yes, that's it, scream. Give it what it wants. Not enough. No, it needs more. More!_

Pain! So much pain. His body was on fire. His mind just as agonized by images of suffering flickering across the vast landscape. Every doubt and fear given life. Every nerve bursting with agony. An overload of senses with darkness skirting its edges. Escape came just in time. When he thought that he could take no more, the blackness of oblivion came crashing down around him.

***

It was a slow and arduous journey back from the abyss. Senses numb from pain, gradually began to feel again. His body felt heavy and unwilling to respond to his commands. The leaden weight was cushioned by the soft mattress beneath him. A fact he thought odd but couldn't quite figure out why. His thoughts as languid as his body. His finger twitched and he felt the gentle material beneath him. It was silky soft, like something out of a dream or memory. He took a deep breath. A mixture of fragrance brought him closer to the surface. He knew if he broke down each smell he could name it. They were all familiar to him even though he had not experienced them for a long time.

The dark void in his mind slowly gave way to the light that surrounded him. From deep black to grey haze beneath tired eyelids. He knew that if he opened them he would regret it. Instead of giving in to curiosity, he decided he should stretch out with his senses first. He focused his mind and drew the Force to him. He was alone in a small room. There were people near by, Force sensitive people. But they were not familiar to him. They were not Togorian.

It hit him then. Memory came flooding back. The last thing he remembered was being put in the SD cell in Ashua Correction Facility. He was put there because he had fought with Kwok, almost killing the gang leader. This was not SD. There was light around him. But more than that he could feel, he could smell and touch. Even more incredible was the fact he could reach out and touch the Force, call it too him and embrace it. _How could this be?_

Instinctually, his hand shot up to touch his neck. He was surprised when his fingers caressed pliant skin. No metal. No collar! The smells that now permeated his nose, a mix of medications and bacta. There was also a hint of flowers, the same mix of flowers in a garden by a pond. He knew exactly where he was! Realization popped his eyes open only to be blinded by white light. Slowly his eyes adjusted, gradually revealing what he already knew. He was in the Healing Ward of the Jedi Temple.

- SW – SW – SW –

I hope it was worth the wait. There's a lot more to come, so hang in there. Thanks for reading and reviewing! It's great to be back again. See you all on the 28th!

~Ari :D


	2. Awakenings

Well, here is chapter 2. Better late than never, ne? Anyway, good news is I start a new job on Monday! So these last few days of freedom I have has been kinda busy. That's why I'm a little late. But it's still the 28th in the rest of the country if not the east coast. So here goes nothing. Thanks everyone who's reading I really appreciate it!!

Irca – Thanks for the review and the well wishes. I am so happy you liked Forsaken and Reliving, thus far. Enjoy!

And on with the story…

- SW – SW – SW-

Chapter 2: Awakenings

_Sleepless thoughts and sightless dreams_

_to the waking mind seems_

_Careless memories of distant nightmares_

_Of which the night gleans._

A hundred and one questions burst within Obi-Wan's thoughts in a matter of a heartbeat. All of which remained mute for the moment as there was no reason to give them voice. Walls could not provide answers and all he could do was wait for another to enter. The hand still seeking the collar slowly moved to massage his temples and he fell back into the medcouch. Closing his eyes his mind began to run through thousands of scenarios that could have brought him back to this place.

And yet on another level his feelings were twisted and tangled. As such he began to break them down touching each one in turn, naming it and letting go. It was a lesson he had learned very early on in his training, one he still practiced on occasion. Confusion – Fear – Relief – Fear – Anticipation – Fear – Hope – Fear. He let out a soft chuckle of dismay. He could already hear in that raspy voice, _Much fear I sense in him._ And it was true. He couldn't believe how much fear had come to permeate his soul but in this peaceful cell it haunted every breath.

Somehow against all hope and reason, he found himself back in the one place he had longed to return to. However, now his heart whispered of a lake near a small village filled with friends and family. A place he wondered if he would ever see again. Would he get the chance to explain to Tuuvu that this was the only way he could see to save them all? That this was the right thing to do? They had too little time on Onderon. The look of anguish on his Patron's face pierced his heart. _What have I done?_

_How could so much go so wrong in so short a time?_ He wanted to know. For all his good intentions he really messed things up. _Will Tuuvu ever forgive me? Will I be alive and sane enough to find out? Can I face the rest of the Jedi after all that I've done? Will I always be looked at as a criminal? Will I ever find a place where I truly fit in?_ That last thought effectively silenced all the others for the moment. It was an underlying question he had been asking himself since he was first shipped off to Bandomeer. One he was still seeking an absolute answer for. So engrossed in his turmoil, he didn't even recognize his own voice echoing his distorted beliefs, "I don't belong here."

"On the contrary, I think you are exactly where you need to be right now." An unfamiliar voice responded. Obi-Wan's eyes popped open to see this intruder. He was surprised to find a young man he guessed was in his twenties with sharp green eyes and soft brown hair. "And don't even think about getting up yet. You are still recovering and trying to do too much too soon will only make my efforts moot." The figure had been leaning just inside the doorway but seemed to spring to life now that his presence was known. He pulled out a datapad that had been tucked under his arm and started looking it over as he closed the gap between them.

The pirate continued to stare for the time being, saying nothing – _revealing_ nothing. His past has made him cautious when encountering new people. However, no matter how leery the youth was, this Healer seemed not to notice. He performed a quick exam, checking readouts and stats. Both remained quiet for the time, speaking only when necessary. Finally, when it seemed they were done, the Healer put the pad down on a shelving unit. "So why do you feel that you don't belong here?"

"I would have thought it obvious."

"Not so obvious apparently." The strange Healer smiled at him.

"You mean you don't know who I am?"

"On the contrary, I know who you are. You're Obi-Wan Ke….." But as the Healer continued, Obi-Wan was no longer listening. In an instant he was in a dark place and he was looking for something. But someone was there stopping him, preventing him from what he needed to do. He wasn't exactly sure where he was or what he was looking for but he had an intense desire to get it back and especially to get it away from this shadow that slowly encircled him. The air was so tense it could snap at any moment. The cloaked figure moved smoothly almost like a black liquid swirling in a lazy whirlpool. It was an incredibly eerie and apprehensive feeling. The swirl closed in on him, cutting him off from freedom, from the air itself. And he wanted desperately to flee, run, escape, anything that would get him away. But he was here for a reason. He needed to find the thing he lost. And he feared that this portentous wraith could lead him on his quest, if only as a means of denying this creature its prize. He felt an icy shiver ripple down his spine as the silhouette lingered at his back. It was then that the words ghosted over him, "I know who you are…" and then froze the air in his lungs, _"Bauudi." _

Suddenly, he gasped, desperate to breathe and the vision shattered. It left a foul residue on his soul. He would have mulled over the sensation but a gentle tenor probed, "Obi-Wan, are you alright?"

Ginger lashes blinked over sea-glazed eyes for a moment while his mind registered the meaning of the words. Visions usually left one disorientated. Hesitantly, he responded, "Yes. I'm fine."

Anyone could see that Obi-Wan was not fine. Aden had been telling the younger man that he was briefed, literally, about Obi-Wan's situation and that he was in charge of the pirate's care when he noticed the readouts on a panel go haywire. When it's only a point or two, it's considered normal. But some spiked while others dropped. Immediately, he looked at the pirate and noticed he was no longer listening. In fact his sparkling eyes dulled and almost appeared grey. Aden couldn't believe it. Earnestly, he asked in a low tone, "You saw something didn't you? Heard something? Felt something?" With startled eyes, the former Jedi stared at the Healer. "It was a vision, wasn't it? Your vitals fluctuated. I've seen it one other time while a patient was here. Was it future? Past?"

"I - I'm not sure. It was like one of my nightmares but different. Swirling, circles." The blurry images slowly melted away in his mind leaving only emotions. Nothing seemed clear and all Obi-Wan could truly recall was a shadow and a circle. There was something wrong with that shape though. Something he should know yet remained just beyond his reach.

"Fascinating. Have you had visions before?"

"Yes." There were some he had as a child before he was sent away. But only a few since his exodus and none too recently.

"Incredible. I've made a personal study of visions and how they affect a being. We shall have to talk again when you are better Obi-Wan. I want to know all about your experiences. If you don't mind, I'm going to take the data from this instance for me to refer to later. Is that alright?"

Aquamarine eyes blinked back at the man in surprise. He could easily say that this awakening has by far been the strangest he'd ever experienced. He found himself in a place he never thought he would be again, talking casually to another Jedi who was intrigued by him enough to warrant further meetings. Didn't they know he was evil incarnate and should be avoided at all costs? "I thought I was a prisoner, I am a convicted criminal. You should be able to do whatever you want. I shouldn't have a say. And as for talking, you should be able to find me in a cell somewhere easy enough."

"Well, I certainly hope not. Even criminals have rights. And from what I remember you were always a gentle hearted child. You cared fiercely for those around you and barely gave a thought for yourself. At least that is how Bant always described you but I gathered as much as well."

"Wha….Wait a moment. We've met before? And you know Bant?"

"Why of course! Bant and I have often worked here in the Ward together. In fact the first time I met you all was here in the Ward. I was just apprenticed to my Master Vv, whom I am certain you would remember as he is the Primary Initiates' Healer. However I should have known you would not remember me. I was very shy back then and very insecure. Mostly I just remained in the background until my services were called for. Allow me to offer my sincerest apologies, I should have introduced myself much earlier. My name is Aden Kai, Apprentice to Master Vv Zon." And the Healer smiled broadly and bowed slightly with hands open and out at his sides.

Obi-Wan ducked his head in response since his prone position would not permit a proper bow. "Obi-Wan Kenobi." He said automatically in response.

Aden straightened. "It is my pleasure to have helped you, Obi-Wan."

The corsair was utterly confused now. His return to the Temple was not at all how he thought it would be like. "I still don't understand why you are being so friendly with someone like me. I would have expected everyone to do their best to stay away from me."

Matter-of-factly, Aden answered, "Then I am glad to disappoint you. Just because you have been found guilty of one trespass, I do not feel that is enough to condemn a soul to the Dark Side. We are all guilty of crimes, no matter how big or small. Innocent or not. It is what we do afterwards that will prove whether or not the punishment is fitting. And I for one do not believe that yours was justified."

"You know of my time in Ashua?" Obi-Wan asked cautiously.

"Only a little." At this, the corner of Aden's mouth turned downward. "I was not impressed with their choice of treatment. And they were not very helpful when I requested detailed reports so I could best take care of you."

It was said in a soft and collected manner but if he didn't know any better, Obi-Wan could almost hear an angry tremor in the man's voice. Then he realized he may get answers to some of the questions his mind craved. "Do you know how I got here then?"

"Regrettably, I was not privy to that information. All I know is that I was on duty when Master Jinn arrived with you in his arms. It took us some time to get him to let go. He was very worried about you, you know."

"Little good it does me now."

"You shouldn't dismiss him so quickly. From what I heard, he was the one who worked tirelessly to get you released from Ashua. They had been denying him his visitation rights and when he finally managed to get to you, you were in such a horrible state. Immediately, he forcibly extradited you to the Jedi. I hear he is looking to get the facility shut down and reorganized before any other children are sent there for _rehabilitation_. You should be grateful he got you out when he did. I believe that you would not have survived their methods for much longer."

"Was that really a blessing?" He had asked himself more than his companion but the other still countered remorsefully.

"Do you wish for death so much? If you feel that you are not worthy of life, I beg to differ. Life gives us the chance to repent for the sins we have committed. You should rejoice in the opportunity that so many have vied to give you. You are being given a second chance. And I hope you accept the challenge instead of believing it a curse." Leaving the subject at that, Aden glanced at his chrono and muttered, "Now I wonder where Bant is. Her class should be over and I can't imagine what would be keeping her. It was hard enough getting her to go in the first place."

"I was wondering why she wasn't here already. She always did tend to fuss when one of us wasn't feeling well." Obi-Wan admitted. Even at the tiniest scratch she was right there making sure it was healed right away. And while he was the one to get the bulk of the bangs and bumps, Garen and Reeft had their share too. They had teased her about it on occasion but she knew how grateful they were to have her around. It only brought them closer together.

"Yes, and she still does fuss as I'm sure you know. It's a good thing you were put under my care. I do my best to keep my patients and those concerned at ease. It's even easier with a degree of familiarity with those involved. I can trust her as she can with me." Aden's grin widened. He was quite pleased that his Master as well as some of the Councilors granted his request to care for the wayward initiate. He knew it should have been his or another Master's burden yet here he was in charge of a special patient. Bant had asked but she was not experienced enough to take on that kind of responsibility let alone the fact that she was personally attached to the patient. It was a great privilege and it showed him that he was close to becoming a Knight himself. Only a couple more years now.

However any further conversation was stalled as the door opened. In the doorway stood the stern visages of an awkward pair. The tall figure of Ki-Adi-Mundi towered over his diminutive companion Evan Piell. Aden immediately turned toward them and bowed. "Masters."

The shorter of the pair looked directly at the Healer and replied, "We have come to check on Kenobi's condition."

The conical head of Mundi turned slightly to regard his colleague before adding, "Yes, We would like to find out how Obi-Wan is doing. May we speak with you a moment Obi-Wan?" The corsair nodded at them as they entered.

Looking back and forth between his patient and the Masters, the brunette questioned softly, "Do you require my services, Masters? I will stay if you do, however I was just about to finish my rounds."

"No, Padawan Kai, you may go about your business. We will not be here for very long."

"Thank you, Masters. I will be back to check on you later, Obi-Wan." With that, Aden bowed and left.

Obi-Wan looked up at the Jedi. He recalled that Ki-Adi-Mundi was on the Council but he did not remember the smaller one. A bit unnerved by the single eye staring at him from just beyond the foot of his medcouch, he waited for them to speak. Fortunately, he didn't have to wait long.

"Hello Obi-Wan, I am Councilor Ki-Adi-Mundi and this is my fellow Councilor Evan Piell. We would like to ask you a few questions and allow you the opportunity to ask any you might have at the moment. As you know, your appearance has given us much to contemplate. Your Republic trial and how their judgment was handled has also forced us to reevaluate our position. Before we begin, do you have anything you would like to ask us first?"

Obi-Wan only had one real question for the Jedi Councilors. "What is to become of me?"

"That is a difficult for us to say. Much must be considered before a final Judgment can be made by the Council. We need to understand many things, get answers to many questions and trust the Force to guide us to the correct decision. And lastly, part of your fate will be in your own hands. You will need to make some decisions for yourself. But that will come closer to the end of your tribunal. In the mean time we need to ask you some questions. Are you prepared?"

"I doubt I'll ever be prepared, Master but I will answer to the best of my ability."

"That will be sufficient. When you were first sent to Bandomeer, how did you feel?"

Evan Piell grunted and then asked what they really wanted to know, "Did you harbour anger towards the Jedi for your dismissal?" The diminutive Councilor was not in the mood for pleasantries or niceties. They were there for a reason and he wanted to get straight to the point. He felt Mundi was wasting time.

Obi-Wan was not expecting this particular inquiry. Yet he answered automatically, "No."

"Truthfully?" Piell demanded doubtfully.

"Yes, Masters. At that time I was disappointed. Very disappointed. I hadn't been picked by a Master when I was sure that I would have been. But more importantly I was disappointed with myself for allowing Bruck to goad me into another fight. I should have realized what he was doing and stopped it before it started. But I didn't and I ended up getting sent away. That is what I felt as I journeyed to Bandomeer."

"And while you were prisoner, did you hate the Jedi? Did you hate your captor?"

"I did not hate the Jedi. Not really anyway. I wanted to know why you didn't come for me. I wondered what I had done to earn your scorn. As for my captor," for a moment Obi-Wan hesitated; a desire to laugh and cry at the same time washed over him. A swell of feelings clashed inside of him as he recalled those dark times. In the end he managed in a tone that barely held his emotions in check he said, "Even though he is dead, I still hate him."

The two Masters looked at each other. Both felt the tremor of dark emotion roll off the former student. "Were you afraid?" Ki-Adi-Mundi allowed his curiosity to surface.

"Every single moment."

"What did you fear?"

"I was afraid I would live out the rest of my days in his hands. I was afraid I would never see my friends again. I was afraid of what would happen if I came back to the Jedi. I was afraid of being discovered. I was afraid I was never good enough. And I have new fears now." The corsair looked down at the clenched fists in his lap and consciously made them relax.

"They are?"

"Your Judgment. My fate." Obi-Wan looked up and glanced between them. He may not have been one of them for five cycles, however being back in the place that nurtured him for so long, that old dream of his was given new life. And that fear that all initiates harbour deep in their hearts revived. Keeping his gaze on them, he confessed, "And that I will never be a Jedi."

"I can offer you nothing to alleviate your fears." The tall Councilor said. "They are yours to deal with. I can only offer my advice. Trust the Force. Release all you fears and hate into it and perhaps you will find peace of mind and soul. Thank you, Obi-Wan, for your candid responses. There will be many more questions to come during the tribunal and we have what we came for right now. You will remain in the Ward until better arrangements can be made. Rest well, young Kenobi. The tribunal commences tomorrow morning. May the Force be with you."

The pair silently made their way out, leaving a bewildered young man behind. He could guess that they were gauging his past, seeing if he had succumbed to the Dark Side. He did not believe he had followed that path, but perhaps he had strayed too close for comfort. The only thing he could do now was answer everything openly and honestly. If they chose to redeem him or condemn him it was their decision and he would abide by it. It was the only thing he could do.

- SW – SW – SW –

I hope things have cleared up just a bit now. So much more is coming, stick with me for a bit longer! Thanks for reading!!

~Ari :D


	3. Reunion

First off, sorry for the delay in posting. I was away for a wedding and didn't get back until today. I promise to be better on the 28th! Secondly, I will reply to reviews tomorrow as I am exhausted right now and can barely keep my eyes open to upload this. But I promise to do it soon! Although I will do one now, as I cannot reply normally to one review. Thanks for your understanding!

**Guest:** As the old adage goes, It must get worse before it gets better. The same goes for Obi. Let's hope he'll make it through no matter what, ne? I am glad to be doing the sequel too. Thanks for reading!!

Now, on with the Chapter!! ENJOY!

- SW – SW – SW -

Chapter 3: Reunion

_Simplicity of sharing love,_

_Can be found in the tiniest gesture._

_When you hold someone else above,_

_You're rewarded by their pleasure._

His thoughts were still adrift on the seas of uncertainty when a familiar sound interrupted. It took his meandering mind only a moment to register what created the sound and by then it was too late. An overexcited Mon Cal Padawan came rushing in, instantly embracing him. He sighed almost contentedly at the situation.

Bant pulled back slightly, her large bulbous eyes consuming his vision. She chastised him, "How dare you wake up without me here? I waited for hours for you and when I finally go to class you wake up!"

He laughed lightly and apologized. From their time spent together after their reunion, he was beginning to feel like his old self when she was around. Visibly relaxing at their familiar banter, he grinned.

She leaned back now and sat down at the edge of the bed, not hiding her assessing gaze. Her healing training as much a part of her now as being a Jedi, she swept her eyes over him. Most of the bruises were gone, only slight discolorations here and there. And his prior pallor was returning to a more natural colour. Satisfied with what she saw, she returned the grin, "You are mending well."

"Apparently, I have been well cared for, according to Padawan Aden Kai."

"So, you've met then?"

"He came in after I woke up."

At that, she frowned. "I was hoping someone would be here for you when you finally woke. I wanted you to know you were safe."

"Don't worry about it. I knew exactly where I was even before I opened my eyes." At her questioning look, he added, "Having been in the Ward often enough in my youth, I became familiar enough with it to recognize it immediately."

"Your youth?" she huffed. "You haven't even hit your eighteenth cycle yet."

He laughed with her despite the haunted feeling that coursed through him. Even though his time in the universe was barely the blink of an eye, he felt so much older than he truly was. So much had happened to him, it seemed incredible to think it had all happened in so short a time.

An awkward, comfortable silence fell between them, if that were possible. The pair were comfortable with each other and constant dialogue was not necessary. However the moment was awkward because neither knew where to go from there. As the last remnants of mirth floated away, Obi-Wan disrupted the stillness. "My Tribunal begins tomorrow."

"Oh, Obi," she whispered. She was not looking forward to the trials he would have to face. And the younger girl knew it was ten times worse for the corsair. She was hoping to avoid this conversation for a while longer. Of course it is no surprise that it would be on the forefront of his thoughts.

"I must admit," he carried on, "After the Republic Trial, I am not feeling very encouraged. And the visit from Masters Mundi and Piell only validate my concerns."

"You mean the Council has already been here too?" At his nod, she frowned. "We were not expecting them just yet."

His normally dulcet tone flat and emotionless, "I gather they are trying to get a head start on the situation."

Bant announced sternly, "You are not a situation."

The pirate's doubtful glare countered that belief. However, she would not be deterred and glared back with equal force. Resignedly he sighed, not really wanting to fight with her. He was still rather tired considering his time spent unconscious. At length, he said, "Maybe not a situation but an enigma all the same. And I'm not speaking of the Jedi only, but to myself as well. For as long as I can remember, I have always wanted to be a Jedi Knight. It was more than just a want, it was a certainty in my mind. I always felt that the Force was taking me down that path until… Then everything changed. _I_ changed. The world around me, life, goals, ideas, wants, needs; the way I once perceived them had twisted somehow and I…" He paused, looking down at his hands.

The salmon flipper of one of his closest friends slowly stretched out to hold onto those fidgeting digits. A wan smile curled one corner of his mouth. Even without words she managed to offer her support and encouragement. "At one time I hoped to find a way back to the Temple, to ask forgiveness and beg to be allowed back into the Jedi. I admit I fell asleep many nights believing that that dream came true. But since stumbling on the Zenah, I have been looking at that hopeless dream with new eyes. I see the faults in my actions and the consequences of my decisions. And now I can not fathom walking these halls once more a Jedi. I cannot imagine after everything that has transpired that the Council could afford to allow me back in. I don't blame them for it; in fact I agree with them."

"Obi, Don't sa-"

"The worst part is that I'm not sure I belong with my surrogate family any more either. They have been so kind and I had hoped to offer them a better way of life at some point despite appearances. Perhaps with this debacle they may finally see reason and find legitimate earnings. I miss them, very much." He felt the sting of tears in his eyes at the thought of Tuuvu and Jorri coping with their loss. "I hope they let go and forget all about me soon."

"And I don't! If they do, then my opinion of your family has been gravely misplaced. However, from what happened on Onderon, I know I am not wrong. In fact, I hope they do what we did not, and find a way to get you back. As much as I want you back here, I would rather you be happy with them than remain here as you are. You speak as if by that one meeting with the Councilors that you are condemned. You sell yourself short. If you continue to act as such you will never be a Jedi." Bant squeezed his hands a little tighter drawing the pirate's gaze to then.

She continued, pulling his eyes back up to meet hers as she spoke. "The Force has a plan for you. It brought you back to us at last. So you may not belong to the Temple. And you may not belong to the pirates. But I know deep within my heart, you belong to the Force. You are a servant of the Force, a Jedi through and through. Never doubt that," she smiled at him triumphantly, knowing she spoke from the bottom of her heart, "I don't." Her only wish was for him to see what she already knew.

Obi-Wan, for his part, was stunned by her words. Force, how he wanted to believe every syllable she uttered but that insipid laugh at the back of his mind continued to mock him. It whispered constantly his failings, beating him down no matter how many times he tried to get back up. Still he was thankful to have someone believe in him amongst his old friends. Smiling, he tightened his hold on her flipper and said sincerely, "Thank you."

"You're welcome," she responded. "Well, now that that is all over, I have a surprise for you. It should be here any moment now."

Thankful for the change of subject and the levity she brought with it, he allowed the curiosity to show on his face. He looked into the silver eyes across from him, smirking. "Surprise? What kind of surprise?"

"Don't give me _that_ look, Obi-Wan Kenobi. _I_ was not the one who planned all those practical jokes that got us into trouble, if I recall correctly. I'm just the one who thinks up all the best surprises." A confident smug expression lighted her features that made the former initiate laugh like the old days.

The ginger-haired young man added, "Hey, I didn't come up with the practical jokes, just the best way to execute them. And they would have all worked without a hitch if everything had simply gone according to plan."

"Precisely my point. There was always something that gummed up the works and I would always have to get involved. I think it was very unfair that I had to bail you out only to get in trouble because it was already too late."

"True, but you weren't alone. We always went down together." He pointed out.

She couldn't argue that fact. Nodding, the Healer agreed, "It was always all or none."

"And you can't deny that we had fun doing it."

Even with the flopping ginger bangs, the sparkling seagems and knowing smirk reminded her of the old Obi-Wan. She laughed happily. "Yes, we did." And the wayward initiate joined her. A chime alerted them that a guest had arrived. "Perfect! Now, I want you to close your eyes." Bant stood and waited for him to do her bidding.

"Aren't we a little too old to be playing these kinds of games?"

"You're never too old to enjoy a surprise. Now close your eyes."

Sighing he knew it was pointless to argue. She would not stop until she got her way. It was a common streak that bound them all together. Stubborn as a nerf. So he closed his eyes.

With a hum of satisfaction, the Mon Cal girl went to admit their guest. As she did so, she added, "Now don't peek."

"I won't." He could hear the door slide open and another person make their way inside and stop next to his bed. He could hear Bant whispering, 'careful' and 'right there.' But it was the wonderful smells that started to fill the room that made him sit up a little straighter in his medcouch. "Can I open now?"

"Not yet." In a hushed voice she said, "That's good. Stop it." She huffed before announcing loudly, "OK, open your eyes."

Without hesitation, Obi-Wan opened his eyes to be greeted with a sight he never expected. On a tray beside him was an array of foods. Not just any food but some of his favourites when he was an initiate. But even more amazing than that was the person who brought it. Five years could not change the Dressellian enough for the pirate to mistake his friend. "Reeft!"

"Obi-Wan!" Arms open, the younger male scooped up his old friend and hugged him tightly. The corsair returned the embrace full force. After some moments, they let go and held each other at arms length. "Good it is to see you again."

"You too. You seem thinner and taller." Sea-washed eyes glanced the figure up and down noting how time had changed him. The wrinkles on Reeft's face only made the small pout that much bigger.

"Tell me about it. Master does not allow much food for me. Keeps on me about proper diet." His eyes darted to the tray full of delicious yummies. "Mind if I have a few bites?"

Obi-Wan laughed. Bant tsked and admonished their friend. "I said stop it. We got all Obi's favourites so that _he_ could enjoy them, not you."

"It's alright Bant. It will be like old times again." Glancing at Reeft, he offered, "Go ahead, dig in." The wrinkles enhanced the happy grin gracing the Dressillian's features.

"Don't encourage him. He'll eat everything before you've even had a bite. Reeft, that's Obi's and you won't ruin the surprise I worked so hard on."

"I said it was alright. I doubt I could eat all of it any way."

"And he could eat four more trays like it." As she pointed at the tray she gasped. In the spans of minutes, Reeft had practically finished off five different items, leaving only a bite or two of each for Obi-Wan. "Now you stop that." She shooed the protesting Padawan away and to the other side of the medcouch where he couldn't reach the tray and eat any more. The whole time the convicted pirate enjoyed the entertainment. "And you better start eating. I stopped in the meal center after class specifically to get this set up for you. The least you could do is eat it."

"All right, you win. I'll eat." Slowly, he began picking at items he hadn't had in years. Delightfully surprised by the familiar tastes, he realized he was much hungrier than he thought. Perhaps he could finish everything after all. And while these mouth-watering treats excited his palette, he was even more anxious to hear from his old friend.

Reeft carefully examined the former initiate for a few seconds before concluding aloud, "Your hair has grown long and your eyes sad." Obi stopped chewing for a moment as he thought of how to respond to such a claim. To be honest, he had no idea what to say. Fortunately, Reeft wasn't quite finished. "Sorry missed me your trial. Off world I was, mission with my Master."

"Don't worry about it. I'm glad you weren't there. You probably wouldn't have liked what you heard."

"That is irrelevant. Would liked to have been there to support you. Always my friend." His warm tone softening, the Padawan added, "Never doubted you were alive." Obi-Wan peered into the black pool eyes of the Dressellian. While they stared at each other, the younger male reached inside the folds of his robe and produced a colourful braid aged with time. It would have matched the one Bant showed her Master and the one she found in the drawer on the Togorian Ship. "None of us did."

In fact, as Bant inched closer on the other side of the medcouch, she withdrew something tucked into her belt. "I told you, we never lost hope that you would return to us." In her flipper rested an all too familiar braid along side its mirror image. "My Master gave me your things to hold until you were well. I couldn't help but look. I thought you might want it back now."

Turbulent seas bubbled over as a tear traced a line down his cheek. It was one of the few possessions he had from his days in the Temple. Something that was saved for him by his Patron. He could never fully express to Tuuvu how much those little scraps of material meant to him. But he thanked him often enough that he was certain his guardian understood. Gingerly, he reached out to collect his worn emblem. Four colours for four friends. Still a bit distracted by everything, he commented, "One of us is still missing."

Bant nodded solemnly, "We know. We had hoped that Garen would have returned by now but it appears he won't be back for a few more days. Don't worry. I know how happy he will be when he hears you're here. Soon we'll all be together again." She was close enough now, that she laid a flipper on his shoulder.

From the other side, Reeft had closed in as well. Mirroring her, he also laid a hand on Obi-Wan's shoulder. The physical connection sparked something in them. He felt the energy flow through him. It was exhilarating. Having been deprived from its comforting touch recently and the years that passed since they had last done this, it was a rush feeling it so strongly again. He could feel the life teaming around him. He wanted to stretch out and touch it all again. However, a dark chuckle at the back of his mind pulled him back in before he could enjoy the sensation too much.

Suddenly, a voice broke the reverie causing the trio to jump slightly. "That doesn't look like nutrition cubes to me."

"Aden Kai!" Bant huffed with exasperation. "Stop sneaking up on me like that!" Laughing, he apologized but she barely heard him. "I brought those in as a surprise," she indicated the tray. He mouthed a playful 'Oh' as she continued, "And how is it you can get into a room without making any noise?"

"Trade secret." He stated matter-of-factly. "It's helpful when walking in on sleeping patients." He came up next to her and whispered, "And occasionally good for sneaking up on people when I don't want them to know I'm there." He winked at her and she smiled. Now, he looked at the others with a small frown, "I wish I could say my visit was merely to check up on my patient, however it would seem that Councilor Adi Gallia would like to speak with Obi-Wan. And as a result, I must ask visitors to leave for the night so my patient will be able to rest after she has gone."

"Why do I have to leave?" complained the Mol Cal Padawan.

"Because you have duties to perform before the night is over and you still have to work on your studies. Can't have you falling too far behind."

"I'm not that behind." Unfortunately, any further protests were silenced by a chime. Knowing their time was up, she turned to the corsair once more. "I'll see you later Obi. I'll try and stop by before the Tribunal. Rest well." She hugged him and waited for Reeft.

"In the Temple for a while me. Find me in the meal center when I'm not in class. Help out when me on planet. See you again soon." The Dressellian clapped him on the shoulder once and followed Bant. The door opened and they walked past the stately appearance of Adi Gallia.

Once they had left, Adi stepped into the room. The pirate noticed Aden bow slightly at her entrance. "Don't mind me, Master. I am just going to gather some data briefly then go."

"No hurry, Padawan. I know you have duties you must perform and this will not take too long." Going about his routine, he melted into the background while the others talked.

Obi-Wan watched the Jedi Master warily. Her piercing gaze seemed to be assessing him as well. Folding her arms in front of her, she stood at the end of his bed. "Obi-Wan Kenobi, tomorrow morning you will be given Jedi robes which you must wear for the Tribunal. You will be accompanied by myself and another Master as we make our way up to the Council Chamber. There you will not speak unless commanded. I must warn you that the Tribunal will commence for a number of days before a decision has been made. The decision will not be made lightly. This experience may be very trying for you. A Soul Healer will be at the Tribunal to assess and support as the need arises. Do you have any questions?"

"Is there a reason why I must wear Jedi robes? I haven't been a Jedi since Bandomeer. I don't think I would feel comfortable wearing them now."

"Regardless of your misgivings, you will wear them. Your previous trial was that of a Republic citizen based upon their rules. The Tribunal is for Jedi and your attire will be those that befit a Jedi. Though you may not have been part of the Order for years your actions will be judged by Jedi standards. Therefore, you will appear the proper Jedi before the Council."

"Yes, Master." Obi-Wan knew arguing would get him nowhere. Besides he had more to worry about than just his clothes.

Now that the formalities have been dealt with, Adi unfolded her arms and relaxed slightly. "Obi-Wan, I wanted you to know that your time in Ashua was regrettable. If we had known that their methods were so archaic, I believe we would have been more active regarding your sentence. As it is, Master Jinn has been striving to correct such grievances in the future. I thought you might want to know."

"So I've heard."

"In that case, I suggest you rest. I sense tomorrow will be very hard for you." She attempted a small smile of encouragement but it still fell a little flat. The young man thanked her for the effort. Billowing brown cloth spun before leaving the room. During their brief discussion, Aden had slipped out leaving Obi-Wan alone with his thoughts once more.

- SW – SW – SW –

Well, another chapter done. I hope you liked it. I did want to add some levity to the story as much more is about to come. Keep an eye out on the 28th for more! And as always, Thanks for Reading!

~Ari :D


	4. The Steps We Take

Hello again peeps! It's story time! Not much to say upfront this time, other than you might recognize some references and to not hurt me for the end of this chappy. ]:D Just need to respond to a couple reviews and then on with the chapter! Yeah!

K-Rock – It's great to see you!! Don't worry I didn't broadcast it too much. Although I probably should post a quick announcement on the yahoo group to let others know it's being officially posted here. Thanks for the minder. Well, I think you will be pleased with what's coming up. It's going to be a ride. [evil laugh] As for Reeft, I actually skimmed through some of the JA books again to see if I could find out more about him. There was very little established other than his love for food and that he was Dresselian. So I took creative license. To be honest, with all the diversity in the Jedi I am surprised that everyone talks to 'human.' I know Basic is something that they are all taught but what's the point of having all these awesome aliens when they all sound human when they talk. Embrace those differences and have fun, I say! So I did. ;P Anyway, thanks for reading and reviewing again!

Pirategirl – Thanks! I am happy you liked Forsaken. I felt so bad leaving it for so long. I'm just excited to finally be continuing the story! Thanks for reading!

Enjoy, Everyone!

- SW – SW – SW -

Chapter 4: The Steps We Take

_So hard are the steps we take,_

_Timid footing or Assured won't shake_

_So often are they made blind_

_Seeking in a forest a path to unwind_

_With one faltered step,_

_May take a lifetime to restore_

_With one's constant regret,_

_Your forgiveness we implore_

Heading to the Healer's Ward, Master Uulia Uvontra Vylond walked calmly down the practically vacant halls. The hour was still very early even for most Jedi. Which was another reason why she was winding her way through the calculated maze that comprised the Jedi Temple. While her services were already procured for the coming Tribunal, she now had the privilege to escort one Obi-Wan Kenobi along with Master Adi Gallia to the Council Chamber. This honour bestowed upon her the previous night when Knight Qui-Gon Jinn had regrettably informed her he was required to attend another meeting regarding the future of Ashua Correctional Facility that would keep him from his duties this morning.

The Council had felt it prudent to conduct Obi-Wan's Tribunal with as much discretion as possible. All sessions would be held under the strictest confidence and at times when there would be fewer observers to notice these special sessions. By doing so, they have only released the information to a select few that would be vital to determining the former student's fate. Of course, being privy to the guarded information was only a necessity for those being summoned at the proper times to appear, give testimony and retire again. This would be quite opposite to the public display of the Republic Hearing that the young man had already dealt with. Only the Council and those they deem integral to the whole proceeding will be able to remain in the Chamber for the whole Tribunal. Fortunately, being a Soul Healer – not only familiar with helping younger Jedi through hard times but also the laws and concepts found throughout the Republic Justice System, Master Vylond would be one of those few.

Stepping inside the main entrance to the Healer's Ward, she raised her paw-like hands and pushed the soft brown cowl off her head. No stranger to this part of the Temple by any means, the Koyn moved past the reception terminal and made her way into the numerous halls that housed various patients. Up ahead she spied a fellow furred humanoid only a third her size at a desk speaking with his apprentice.

"Your theories are sound, Aden but you still need more data to back them up. Once you have that, you can present it to one of the Sages and see what they can do to help you further in your research." She smoothly stepped up to them.

"Best of the day to you, Master Zon, Padawan Kai." She bowed her head slightly in their direction.

The pair glanced up and bowed as well. "Best of the day to you too, Master Vylond. What brings you here so early?"

"Former Initiate Kenobi. I will be escorting him to the Council with Master Gallia."

Vv frowned, "Is Qui-Gon alright?" He knew that the man had been working feverishly to get Obi-Wan back, and to not be here for the start of this Tribunal was very surprising.

"I assure you, he is well. Just tied up with Republic Correction System business. He asked I take his place."

The Head Healer nodded then glanced at a chrono on the desk. "A bit early aren't you?"

"Yes, I was hoping to speak with Obi-Wan briefly before we headed to the Council."

Padawan Kai stood up then and began, "I have not checked on Obi-Wan this morning. I was going to take in his morning meal in a quarter hour."

"No need to alter your schedule on my account. I will check on him and should he still be asleep, I will return to wait with you."

"By all means, Master." And Aden led her down the hall to indicate the room she would find her query. "I will send for that meal now and deliver it as soon as it arrives."

She nodded her thanks as he walked off. With one thickened finger she pressed the entrance button and was greeted with a sight she wasn't expecting. Not only was Obi-Wan Kenobi awake, but just slipping on the earthen cloak of a Jedi. His back was to her as she walked in. "Did you not sleep well?"

Glancing over his shoulder, ginger bangs concealed jade-like eyes. "I've slept enough already."

"You seem to have healed well. How do you feel?" She attempted to make light conversation. Unfortunately, light conversation never really worked for her.

"How do you think I feel?" He hissed and then sighed. The slightly deflated posture reflected his fluctuating emotions. "I'm sorry."

"No, the error was mine. I did not consider my words before I spoke them. Even though your body may be healed your soul is still in turmoil."

He turned to look at her now. "Is that why you're here?" He was already aware of her credentials from the Republic trial and he was still convinced that part of the reason for her presence was because of her feline features. A cousin to the Togorians, Koyn are a bit more slender and a little taller in their stature. The fact that she happened to be a Soul Healer with a lot of Republic contacts was just a bonus.

"No, actually. I am here by the request of Qui-Gon. He was unable to accompany you this morning to the Council."

Obi-Wan let out a small huff of a laugh. "Figures."

"It was merely a delay in his attendance, but I assure you that he will be there for the remainder of your Tribunal."

"That's not very reassuring, Master. It's not going to matter much if he's there or not."

"Obi-Wan, your case is not entirely hopeless. Granted, history shows that this is not something that happens often for us to establish proper guidelines or rules. Each case has been vastly different from the prior incident. Your situation is like none other within the archives. To rule out all hope already is to accept defeat. And from all the information I have come to learn about you, defeat is not something you handle very well." She smiled at him encouragingly.

The pirate eyed the furred woman for a moment. A few years ago he would have agreed with her without hesitation but that was before Drrov. That bastard, in every sense of the word, really had spun his life on its head. His thoughts wanted to float back to that time, but he reined them back. Attempting to divert his memory, he asked, "So why are you here? I mean, Master Gallia hasn't arrived yet, so you must have had some reason for coming here this early."

"It is true that I did wish to speak with you. And despite your beliefs, I am here because I do wish to help you. As I mentioned before, Tribunals do not happen often, and while detailed accounts of what may and may not be done are not available, they do have some basic guidelines on how to proceed. I want you to know and understand that this will be very hard on you. They will do everything in their power to root out the truth. They will seek to uncover all that is needed to determine your future. You must be prepared for what is to come. I cannot help you through most of it, but I will be there for you should you need any support."

"Thank you, Master," Obi-Wan said genuinely. With all that has already transpired, finding an ally during such troubling times is comforting. "Is there any speculation on what might be the outcome of this Tribunal?"

She shook her head slowly, "Nothing solid. What do you think will happen?"

The pirate turned and sat down on the medcouch, his back to the Master once more. "Force removal and banishment if I'm lucky."

"I would like to believe that those extreme measures would not be used in this day and age." With a small sigh she continued, "However, such thoughts have already been voiced." Obi-Wan glanced at her again for a moment, then simply nodded his understanding. She did not mention this to discourage him but to prepare him for that possible outcome. Carefully, Uulia positioned herself on the medcouch opposite Obi-Wan, mirroring his posture. "When we are young and learning within these walls, we are told of the trials of life we will face. And as padawans we begin to understand what was being taught to us. Many of us deal with hard realities and find ways to cope with them. You have dealt with more than most will ever know, including some of the Masters. This is the purpose of these hearings. For them to understand what has happened to you and how you have dealt with them.

"As I said, this will be very hard for you. To open yourself up and allow them to see things through your eyes. And I believe this will be hard for them, too. Much has changed after your dismissal. They are beginning to realize some ideas may sound good at the time but in reality often fall short of their mark. Established traditions falter in a new age. While you have suffered greatly, you were also fortunate enough to have some light in your life. Show them this and be truthful to yourself and to the Masters. And I know that the proper choices will be made. The Force is with you, Obi-Wan, always." She reached out with one hand and clasped his taut shoulder. Squeezing gently, she noticed his tension and asked, "Have you meditated yet this morning?"

"No, Master, I have not. I, uh, I was finding it hard to concentrate." He admitted. When he first awoke, he tried to go back to sleep. However his thoughts began to drift toward his future and what may become of him. Sleep would no longer be his refuge, so he woke and found that his Jedi robes had already been delivered. He still felt unsure about donning such attire again so he simply concentrated on relaxing his muscles. He hadn't really moved in a few days so he needed to work out some of the kinks in his body. Soon he found himself caught up in thought, unable to find peace or calm. He attempted to still his mind with light meditation but as soon as he began to feel himself settle an insipid voice would mock his efforts, breaking him further away from the peace just beyond his grasp. At last, he decided he might have better luck if he pretended to rewind time and dress in the clothes provided to see if by looking like a Jedi he could act like one again too. Although, this was further stalled by the appearance of Master Uvontra.

"Perhaps, a bit to eat might help." A new but familiar voice offered. Both Obi-Wan and Uvontra turned to find Aden Kai standing in the doorway. Neither had heard his entrance. Lofting up a tray, Aden smiled and stepped into the room. "You haven't really had too much to eat since your emergence. And the snippets Bant brought are not what I would call proper nutrition for a recovering patient."

Uulia stood and folded her arms across her chest. "Padawan Kai, how is it that you can enter a room without notice so well?" Obi-Wan smiled. It appeared that she did not appreciate the young man's stealth.

"Trade secret," he answered automatically. He put the meal on a tray stand next to the medcouch and pushed it over to Obi-Wan. "Let me know if you would like anything else. Bant mentioned some of the foods you preferred. I hope you find this satisfactory." Aden then looked at the Koyn. "I took the liberty of ordering something for you too, Master. I will be back in a moment with yours."

"Thank you, Padawan."

"Not at all, Master." And then he left. She was grateful for his consideration. She had only eaten a quick snack before heading to the Healer's. The Temple's meal center was not ready to accommodate early risers. And she did not have anything to prepare in her apartment. Fortunately, her own padawan had left out some fruit and sweet biscuits for her last night. Her padawan apparently anticipated her early departure. Turning her attention back to Obi-Wan, she agreed, "I believe Padawan Kai is right. You should eat. You will need all your strength for the day ahead."

Obi-Wan looked at the tray in front of him; a plate of sliced nipa fruit, noran juice, skrim patties, Aldaranian sweet bread, and topas. It all looked good. And it was something he would happily have eaten on any other day, but he just didn't have the desire to eat that morning. Of course, he knew he should eat, just as the Master said, still he found himself staring at the plates.

Aden returned with the second tray and placed it on an end table, then pulled up a chair for Master Uvontra to sit in. Accepting her thanks, he went to the end of the medcouch and watched his patient. Sighing, he sat down on the end of the bed, leaned over slightly in the younger man's direction and said, "It's getting cold."

"I know, it's just…"

"How about I tell you a little story and you eat while I talk?" Without waiting for a proper reply, Aden began his tale. "You see, a couple of cycles back, my Master and I were sent on a retrieval mission to a war torn planet. Knight Parisi Troth was dispatched to that world in order to resolve the conflict between the people that had persisted for centuries. Unfortunately, they were not eager for her assistance and ended up holding her prisoner. The Council sent us to get her back, as they had reason to believe she was injured. What we found on that planet was that the children of these battling people had banded together and called for Jedi aide. They wanted peace but could not convince the adults to stop fighting. It was one of the hardest missions I have ever been on."

Obi-Wan managed to take several bites of his morning meal while the Padawan spoke. During this monetary pause, the corsair wondered exactly where this conversation was going. He nudged it along with a question, "What made it so difficult?"

"As I said, we were sent to retrieve Master Troth. As simple as that. Go in, find her and bring her home to the Temple. But how could I leave when all those children looked to us with hope in their eyes? How could we as Jedi abandon them when they had called out to us for help? I couldn't just leave them."

"So what did you do?"

"I stayed."

"So you and your Master helped out those kids?"

"No, _I_ stayed and helped them. My Master returned to the Temple with Knight Troth. And while my end result may have brought peace in some small way to their world, it was not quite befitting a Jedi."

"How so?"

"I was not trained for negotiations. I used what means were disposed to me."

"In other words, he drugged the leaders to facilitate the peace talks." Master Uvontra elucidated with a tiny smirk.

Standing up, one hand came up to scratch the back of his head, Aden chuckled. "Yes, well. I was never very good at Force Suggestion so I did the next best thing. I'm a practical man. The tools I am familiar with are medicine – knowledge and application. It's not something I'm too proud of nowadays, but I felt it necessary at the time. I'm just thankful that it worked."

"Barely," the Koyn added. "If not for that I would doubt you would be standing here today."

Curiously, Obi-Wan glanced between the pair. "What do you mean by that?"

"Master Zon and the Council were not pleased with Kai's decision to expand his mission."

"By staying, I had willingly left the Order." Aden stated plainly.

"Left the Order?" The corsair could not fathom such a concept. Wasn't it every initiate's dream to be a Jedi? How could someone willingly walk away from that?

"Yes, but after I managed to get the leaders to sit down together, I had them contact the Temple and ask for proper Jedi help. Knight LaMinott came and established proper negotiation between the parties and brought me back. My actions had caused quite a stir for a while just not in the way I imagined. It caused doubt and fear among the students regarding their place in the Order. Adding to the already shaken initiates after the debacle with you and Bruck. It took me some time to win back the trust of my Masters and peers, but I did it."

"Is that why you're telling me all this? That despite what has happened I can still come back and be a Jedi?"

"That's one way to look at it. Truthfully, I just wanted you to know that even though we are all Jedi, we are still simple beings inclined to make mistakes now and then. And sometimes one mistake can balance out another. I made the mistake in trying to take on a problem that was not mine nor capable of truly handling it. However, I felt it a bigger mistake to ignore the needs of those kids. I believe the Council made a mistake in letting you go. Perhaps now is their time to redeem that mistake." Aden looked at his chrono. "Now, I shall take my leave, as it seems Master Gallia has just arrived. I will send her in momentarily." He gathered the now empty tray from his patient and left satisfied.

As soon as the door closed, Obi-Wan stood and looked at Uvontra. "Is it true, he left the Jedi?"

"Just as he has explained to you." The young man drifted off into his thoughts as Uulia watched him. Even without the distinctive Padawan tail, she felt he looked like a proper Padawan. "Those robes suit you, young one."

The pirate smiled sadly. "I'd forgotten how comfortable they are." Any further talk was halted by the appearance of Jedi Councilor Adi Gallia and Padawan Kai.

The stern woman greeted, "Master Vylond." Then she turned to the ginger haired youth. "Obi-Wan, I am glad to see you are ready. Shall we depart?"

With no reason to argue, the pair moved to follow the honey-toned woman out of the room. Just as Obi-Wan stepped through the door, Aden placed a hand on his shoulder and said, "May the Force be with you, Obi-Wan." Nodding his gratitude, Kenobi continued to follow the Councilor. Together the odd trio left the Healer's Ward. Before they entered the hallway beyond, all brought up their hoods.

At such an early hour, the halls of the Temple were still relatively empty. Despite the anonymity that the brown cloaks could often maintain in a crowd, Obi-Wan felt as if the few they did pass watched his every move. That they knew this was the convicted criminal, lost Jedi initiate on his way to trial. Or perhaps, on his way to conviction and execution instead. The weight of their eyes and disapproval bore heavily on him as the trio walked. He was almost certain that it was his own beliefs on his fate that weighed him down. However, with such a feeling of insecurity and loss of control over his life, it was hard to think otherwise.

The journey was swift and silent. They had not run or hurried, rather each step was purposeful and deliberate. Together they rode up a lift that carried them up the central spire of the Temple toward the Council Chamber. No words were spoken. Not even the soft sound of breathing could be heard. Silence so loud, it was deafening. Master Gallia and Master Uvontra stepped out into the anti-chamber when the doors opened. Obi-Wan followed. A few steps shy of the Council Door, Uulia stopped causing him to halt as well. Master Gallia continued on and entered the room.

Heart pounding in his chest, palms feeling cold and clammy against his concealed forearms under the chocolate sleeves, Obi-Wan could feel his entire body tighten up. He made no attempts to shake this anxiety that devoured him. After all, the last time he entered this room his life ended. No, not in flesh, but his spirit had been dealt a death blow and he had been an empty shell as he left to start his new life on Bandomeer. How the twists and turns of fate could be so cruel. He wondered once again, what would be in store for him this time.

Uulia removed her hood and turned to glance over the young man. Even if she didn't have the Force to heighten her senses, she could see how tense Obi-Wan was. She did not envy his position by any means. The ordeals he had already overcome, will pale in comparison to the ordeal he is about to face. And for the first time in her life, she had no reassuring words to offer, nothing to ease his burden, and it shook her to the core. She found herself seeking solace in familiar rituals, the motions that dictated their every step. Automatically, she spoke them aloud. "Master Gallia has gone in to inform them you are here. When they are ready for you, they will summon you. I will be right behind you. As I said, I am here for you. If you need me, reach out and I will be there for you."

Obi-Wan tried to focus on her voice and words. Anything to pull him away from the terror that choked him. And as he looked up at the Koyn, he could not fault the Council for her continual presence. Because, as much as he wanted to resent them for trying to use her to lower his defenses, he was glad she was here. There was a gentle air about her that reminded him of Jorri, his surrogate Togorian mother. While their colouration may differ greatly, their shape and mannerisms are similar enough for him to feel some of the tension ease. He knew without her to sooth his fraying nerves, he probably would have already snapped under the pressure. Glancing up, he caught sight of her pale blue eyes and noticed she was seeking his understanding on what she said. He offered the slightest of nods, but it was enough.

Just then, the Council doors swung open ominously. There was no one by the doors, and Obi-Wan could see the Council seated in their circle. Even Adi Gallia had taken her place. The strong deep voice of Mace Windu called from inside, "Obi-Wan Kenobi, Enter."

Slowly, the young man put one foot in front of the other, until he found himself in the middle of the Chamber. Master Uvontra was just behind him up until he reached the outer circle of the Council, where she stopped. He stood alone amidst the stern visages of the Jedi Masters. He offered a small, awkward bow. They seemed not to notice.

Mace continued to bore his piercing deep brown eyes into the pirate. After what seemed like an eternity, he announced, "The Tribunal of former initiate Obi-Wan Kenobi begins." The doors of the Council Chamber boomed closed.

- SW – SW – SW-

Dun dun duuunnnn. LOL. So any idea what the next chappy will be? No? Guess you'll have to wait and see. ;)

Anyway, I did want to do a quick **Author's note** at the end here. I have not read the Jedi Apprentice series in a very long time. And for some reasom I was under the impression that Obi-Wan got his 'walking papers' from the Council directly. But as I skimmed through the book again briefly to review Reeft, I discovered that Obi-Wan had never been in the Council Chambers, he had not really dealt with any other masters that I could see except Yoda. However, since I had previously established this history in Forsaken, I have decided to maintain continuity of the story rather than try to fix it all. Please forgive me!

Otherwise, I hope you enjoyed it and I'll see you all on the 15th!

As always, Thanks for reading!

~Ari :D


	5. So it begins

Hello everyone! I am posting the next chapter early because I will be off soon to Disney for my birthday present! And I don't know exactly when I'll be back. I hope you all enjoy this next chapter! Thanks!

K-Rock – Wow, thanks. I liked the courtroom scenes too. I'm not sure how much I can do that here, but I will try. And it's funny you mention that. I actually started reading that again myself. It was going great! We will need to pull that back off the shelf soon to finish it up. ;) Thanks!

-SW – SW – SW -

Chapter 5: So it begins….

_Who am I? Wayward son,_

_Shattered before the day begun._

_Who am I? Fading star,_

_Darkness bred from afar._

_Who am I? Student lost,_

_Wondering at what the cost._

_I am none and all in one,_

_Redemption hoped to be won._

------------------------------

The tension was wound so tightly within the chamber Obi-Wan feared that even the slightest breath could cause the world to shatter in a million pieces. The twelve frowning countenances that surrounded him bore deeply into his soul. Automatically, he stretched out with his senses to grasp desperately at the Force in hopes that its soothing powers could wash over him. It did not offer the encompassing relief he desired; however, it did soften the rigid edges that confined him. He took a deep breath, not realizing he had been holding it since his entrance, and looked between Master Windu and Master Yoda.

Sensing the change in their former student, Windu leaned forward, propped his elbows on his knees and steepled his fingers under his chin. "Obi-Wan Kenobi, Do you know why you are here?"

"Yes, Master," he answered.

"Then tell us in your own words so that we know you understand."

"I have already been convicted of crimes against the Republic. While still considered important, they pale in comparison to the possibility that the teachings of the Jedi could be twisted to cause harm to those that we are meant to protect. Worse yet, should one succumb to the power of the Dark side then they have chosen a path of hate and evil. A lustful desire to hurt others. A desire that the Jedi cannot allow free under any circumstances."

Taking another deep breath, the corsair glanced around at the masters in his view. "So by the judgment of the Jedi Council, it will be determined if I, Obi-Wan Kenobi, have allowed the Dark side to control my life and cloud my own judgment causing me to harm the Republic I was trained to defend. And if found to be true, the Council will take such actions as they see fit to remove that threat from the galaxy."

A subtle glance passed through the surrounding members. At their head, Mace continued to watch the former Jedi. After a long pause, he asked, "And should the judgment of this Council find the perpetrator a servant of the Dark side, would he be willing to accept the edict we set forth without provocation?"

"I will, Masters." Bowing his submittal, he added, "My fate is in your hands."

Satisfied, Mace proclaimed as he sat back in his chair, "Then we shall proceed."

"Explain to you we will what is to come." Yoda took control suddenly. "Steps will be taken to understand and review your past. Determine your current status we will as well. Time this will take. A decision slowly, carefully must be made."

"I understand, Master."

Mace then demanded, "Then tell us young Kenobi, how do you see yourself right now? What is your plea?"

"I…" the corsair swallowed, concentrating on the ornate inner circle of the Chamber floor. "I don't know. I mean, I know that there have been many things I have done that were not proper, not part of my upbringing. Mistakes I have made. Conscious decisions I made that affected others' lives. But the Dark side?" He shook his head and closed his eyes, searching deep inside to see if there was evil there. "I just don't know if it is in me. I have been angry so many times. At myself and at others. Especially Drrov. I wanted to hate him. I can't stop hating him. I was glad when he was killed. I felt justice had finally been served. But during that time, there is a possibility that my anger and hate could have possibly caused me to touch the Dark side unwittingly."

"The boy admits his guilt!" Even Piell gestured to the accused, glaring at the two leaders of the Council. "Why should we continue this farce? We should act now and expunge the darkness from our Temple."

"Hasty that decision is." Yoda restated his prior concerns.

"He has merely expressed the possibility. We cannot condemn without fully knowing the facts." Ki-Adi-Mundi added.

Piell continued to argue, "Can you not sense the Dark side in him? Why risk contaminating the Order?"

"Perhaps it would be wise to consider the risk and destroy the source. Even the smallest chance that the Dark side could seed itself here should not be permitted, allowing our actions to be justified in the cause." Plo Koon reasoned.

But it was Yaddle's insight that would quell this debate for the moment, "Erasing one source the Dark side we will not stop. To act first without proper consideration we should not. Lessons we should not forget from the Padawan Massacre.(1) Allow history to repeat we should not. Consider all factors we must."

The sudden spurt of tension seemed to ease slightly. And for a few horrifying minutes Obi-Wan worried that his journey may end before his Tribunal even began. But what struck him even harder than his possible demise, was the declaration of the Dark side in him. He barely kept his feet as the world dropped out from under him. What he had feared was suddenly brought to reality. All the hope he had left seemed to crumble away.

"We are here to examine all evidence, all possibilities prior to forming any judgment. All further debates regarding this Tribunal will end now, only when it comes time to determine the fate of Kenobi will we discuss such options." Mace announced to his fellow Councilors. He looked once again at the subject of this trial and addressed him, "Obi-Wan, you will tell us everything that has happened since last you left this chamber. Leave nothing out and provide as much detail as you can."

Nodding his understanding, Obi-Wan closed his eyes, turning inward to seek out the memories he had buried so long ago. He had suspected this request and hoped he would be strong enough to get through it all. Once he was in touch with his past, he opened sea-misted eyes and began his tale.

Obi-Wan started with his walk back to his room where he prepared to leave for Bandomeer. Telling of Bant's visit and of breakfast the next morning. The conversation with Bruck and the chance to redeem himself. He spoke of the fight and his last moments with Qui-Gon and the subsequent rejection. He mentioned how Qui-Gon's dismissal had seeded his deepest fear of the Dark side which he still holds. Then he told how he had left the Temple for the last time. The regret and sorrow that consumed him. He was just about to begin telling about his arrival on the _Monument_ when the Chamber door opened.

A tall cloaked Jedi strode to the center of the room and stood next to Obi-Wan. Bowing deeply, the figure announced, "Forgive my tardiness Masters, I was needed to set final preparations for Ashua Correctional Facility's reformation." As he rose, he pushed back the hood to reveal the strong leonine features of Qui-Gon Jinn.

"Aware we were of your duties. But glad that you are here now." Yoda greeted his old friend.

Mace gestured to Master Uvontra who had been silently standing along the perimeter. "Please take your position next to Master Vylond. Young Kenobi is relating his story right now."

Qui-Gon offered a small bow then turned. He looked directly at Obi-Wan and smiled reassuringly. He placed a firm hand on the young man's shoulder and said, "I apologize for my absence but it was necessary. But I am here now, for you. Should you need anything, just call me." He squeezed the shoulder for a moment and then walked back to take his position.

"Continue please, Obi-Wan," the dark Jedi requested.

And so he did. Obi-Wan explained how shortly after arriving on the _Monument_ he ran into a Hutt who saw fit to beat him. When he came to in the medical room, he found out who and why. He recalled how he did not think that the situation should be allowed to continue but it seemed as if there was little that could be done to change it, especially in his condition. He had a brief conversation with one of the Arconan miners but the conversation was hazy and he had a difficult time really focusing on anything. He was still in the ward when the ship was attacked. Struggling, he managed to help some of the crew fend off the pirates until his illness and their ferocity overpowered him. Much of what happened after passed in a hazy blur for some time until Tuuvu managed to nurse him back to some semblance of health.

It is what followed his return to reality that the real nightmare began. It was hard for him to speak at times. He found that focusing on the floor in front of him, he was able to remove himself from his memories in order to tell them about the torture that Drrov enjoyed so much. The pain and humiliation he endured. And what he was forced to do. The fights. Death, by his hand. And after what seemed like an eternity, his sudden freedom.

Expressing the kindness and love of his Patron and Matron was effortless compared to his time with Drrov. He realized that he could talk of them forever if allowed. And his heart ached for them. Tuuvu and Jorri had done so much for him, much more than he ever thought he deserved. He thanked the Force they were able to pick up his broken pieces and mend a wounded heart. How could he abandon them?

The years that followed his recovery seemed to fly by even though he talked for hours. His attempt to return to the Jedi, and his decision to leave again were all revealed. His part in helping Tuuvu re-establish a better crew and set guidelines for their pirating activities he divulged to the Councilors. Their acceptance of him into their society was wonderful and overwhelming considering his own lack of self worth.

He left nothing out. His moments of anger and self loathing. His joy in watching his new friends gain a better understanding of their abilities. That everyone on the _Night's Scream_ had latent or conscious Force abilities. That the ship itself required a crew of Force sensitives to fly her. His limited knowledge of the ship and where it came from according to Tuuvu.

Obi-Wan even went into detail his foreboding of the raid that revealed his existence to the Jedi once more. How his emotions were tossed and capsized on the turbulent seas of uncertainty. His actions on the _Zenah_. Their crash landing. The recreation room and the fight with Mortius Griven. Bartering between the parties to do what he knew to be right. His acceptance of his discovery and returning to the Jedi for punishment.

It was the heartbreaking moment on Onderon when his betrayal was revealed that made him pause. Those green eyes that pleaded for this all to be some twisted nightmare haunted his soul. The torture of Force Deprivation when the collar was put on and the constant teasing when it was removed only to be replaced again. Another heart wrenching moment when he spoke of his conversation with Master Jinn telling him that there was nothing wrong with him. That all he had endured was not some divine just punishment but the sick rage of an evil creature. Additionally supported by the conversation Obi-Wan had with the troll seated calmly in front of him while he awaited his Republic trial. His feeling and thoughts during the trial and sentence.

He admitted that the only thing he could fully and clearly remember was his entry into Ashua. His battle with his memories that seemed to engulf him during his stay at the correctional facility. Battles he lost frequently. How his memory and the haunting voice of his old captor blended in with reality causing him to be constantly confused. A nightmare he could not escape from. In truth he had no recollection of Qui-Gon finding him and bringing him to the Temple. Only that his mind finally cleared when he woke up in the Healer's Ward once more reunited with the Force.

He mentioned his caretaker and the vision he had. His visitors, Bant and Reeft. The Councilors, Ki-Adi-Mundi, Even Piell and Adi Gallia all coming to talk with him. And this morning when Master Uvontra explained her presence. Of their trek to the Council Chamber after Adi arrived. The feeling of uneasiness as they walked the halls. He went as far as to speak of his entry to the Chamber and his reaction to Piell's declaration. The fear that now consumed him, _Did the Dark side live in him?_ After numerous hours, Obi-Wan finally concluded his narrative with, "Now I am standing before you for judgment and I have told you everything that has happened in my life since the last I left this Chamber."

The Council and his supporters had listened intently to his tale without any interruptions (apart from Qui-Gon's entrance.) They allowed his life to wash over their thoughts, categorizing, reviewing, storing all the information they had just been given. The room remained silent as he waited for the Council to make their next move.

At last, Ki-Adi-Mundi said, "Thank you, Obi-Wan. We are grateful for everything you have provided us."

"Just because he _claims_ to have told us everything, it does not exonerate his crimes." Piell pointed out.

Adi Gallia chimed in, "I do not recall Master Mundi saying that it had."

"Then how can we be certain he has told us the truth?" demanded the Lannik.

"You forget two of us were on the _Zenah_ when the pirates attacked. And others were involved with his return to Coruscant and the Republic trial. His testimony has been quite accurate."

"So he could not lie during some of his story, but can we be sure that the accuracy holds true for everything else?"

At this Obi-Wan interjected, "Everything I have told you was the truth. Why would I wish to deceive you after all that has happened?"

"Who knows what plots a servant of the Dark side might have in store for us?"

Taken aback by the accusation, the corsair could not find the words to rebut his possible ties to the Dark side. However, a calm, slightly gravelly voice from behind him decided to intercede. "Perhaps there is a solution to settle this conflict."

Yoda gripped the gimmerstick in his hands a little tighter and asked, "And what suggestion have you, Master Sifo-Dyas?"

"We could utilize an ancient technique to discern if the truth has been provided. By invoking a Force Probe, we can delve into the subject's own memories and seek out any discrepancy. As I recall in my research, it would be the Council's decision to permit the procedure and the subject would have to grant unlimited access to their mind. To prevent any bias or misinterpretation, at least six Masters would be involved in the probe. But if the Council so chose, all members could participate. By having the option to probe the memories that may have led young Kenobi down a darker path, we may be able to validate or nullify Kenobi's connection to the Dark side."

Qui-Gon protested, "In my travels I have seen a similar such procedure once. The beings were highly telepathic and even they feared the repercussions of such a process. Only a few were involved, to do so now with so many could be considered extremely dangerous."

Plo Koon regarded the Knight, "You are not a member of the Council, Master Jinn. You are here to support Kenobi during his Tribunal. It is not your place to intercede with Council proceedings. However, I do agree with Master Jinn, it is dangerous."

"Agree I do. Entering one's mind careful one must be. Grievous harm not only to the subject but the intruders as well. A Force Probe we should not." Yoda frowned at such a suggestion.

"And why should we not consider it?" Piell continued to argue. "If it is a viable option to find the truth, we should be able to utilize it. We are here to determine Kenobi's fate. You want us to consider all factors. Yet if we have doubts about his actions how do we make proper decisions? Here is the opportunity to cast away doubt by viewing the evidence with our own eyes."

Yareal Poof voiced his thoughts. "The danger is considerable for those involved. But to uncover the truth is our primary objective. This Tribunal in itself is both expected yet unorthodox because of the subject of our meeting. An enigma has been presented to us. To unravel it, we must be willing to go beyond our normal procedures and consider alternative methods."

"Master Tiin is an exceptionally skilled telepath," Oppo added. "He could lead the Probe. And only a select few should be permitted to accompany him. That way it might not be as hard on young Kenobi, but will at least allow us to gain a better perspective."

"And just how many do you suggest should be allowed to invade Kenobi's mind?" Master Gallia questioned. "I do not believe everything provided automatically, but I also do not feel that this type of action is befitting of the Council either."

The Lannick Master glared at his fellow Councilors as he posed, "Then does any one have any other suggestions on how we can sort out the fact from fiction?" There was a long pause while he waited for a response. And when he got one, it was not from whom he expected.

"Masters, I feel that the decision on this matter partially falls on me. While I understand it is your right to do so with or without my permission, I also know a willing subject is far more desirable than unwilling. If it would ease the concerns of some Councilors, then I would not be opposed to the procedure." Obi-Wan bowed slightly to show his acquiescence.

Qui-Gon had been biting his tongue since Koon's reminder, however he could no longer keep it. "Obi-Wan you have only just regained your strength. To subject yourself to such an invasion could be catastrophic to your mind and body. Are you certain you are willing to do this?"

Obi-Wan turned to regard his would-be mentor with a sad smile. "I am here Master Jinn because I chose to be. No one forced me to come, it was by my will that I returned to face what the Force had in store for me. While it was the encounter on the _Zenah_ that allowed our paths to cross again, I knew that I could not hide from the Jedi forever. One day I would have to come back. My fears kept me prisoner. And if what Master Piell senses is true, I want to know if the Dark side really is in me, no matter the cost. I grow weary from the shackles of my past. If this can free me from them, then I am willing to accept the risk."

"Then it is decided," Mace said calmly. "We shall perform a Force Probe."

- SW – SW – SW-

Now, a quick Author's note for you. (1) The Padawan Massacre is an actual event. Basically, one of the Masters, that was part of a small group, had a dream that someone was falling to the dark side. They believed it was one of their padawans. Since they could not determine which of the padawans it was, they decided to kill them all during their 'knighting ceremony.' But one of the padawans was late and survived the massacre. The fallen jedi ended up being one of the Masters. It was an interesting story and if you want to read more about it, go to Wookiepedia and look up 'Padawan Massacre.'

I hope you enjoyed it and the next chap will be up on the 28th. See you all then!

~Ari :D


	6. Echoes of the Past

It's the 28th and it's time for another chapter. Wanted to post again early because we're off to Disney again for my daughter's birthday gift! Enjoy!

K-Rock – Thanks! We had fun. Ate at an Irish restaurant in downtown Disney and they had a couple guys singing. It was cool. Yeah, I was hoping to get more of a recap earlier but this is when it showed up. And I had been trying to work Qui in for a long time too. I'm just glad he was finally able to make an appearance. Congrats! I wish I had a new job. :( But Good Luck! Moving is hard and I wish you all the best. Don't worry, take your time. Thanks!

Asdfjkl – I'm really trying to keep up with posting. And I want to keep interruptions to a minimum, so hopefully my plan will work. ;) Thank you very much! I appreciate it! And I think I can accommodate your request. You'll just have to be a bit patient. ;) Thanks!

And on with the chapter!

- SW – SW – SW -

Chapter 6: Echoes of the Past

_Who am I? Restless beast,_

_Anger, fear once were pleased._

_Who am I? Tortured Soul,_

_A heart as black in night as coal._

_Who am I? Frightened child,_

_Once with spirit, free and wild._

_I am none and all in one,_

_Shadow owned, away from sun_

---------------------------------------

"You cannot be seriously considering this, Mace." Qui-Gon protested. "Has he not already been through enough trials? To put him through another now is questionable?"

"And why not? Obi-Wan has already accepted the risks. If he is willing, then we are not subjecting him to any more than he can handle."

"Master Yoda, you must see that this should not be permitted?"

"Dangerous it is. Agree with Probe, I do not." But Qui-Gon's momentary triumph was quickly dismissed by Yoda's rueful sigh. "However, decision by the entire Council will be honoured."

Mace understood what the venerable Master had requested. "All in favour of conducting a Force Probe, indicate so." The stern council head raised his hand slightly, then counted the others around him. They included: Plo Koon, Yareal Poof, Even Piell, Sifo-Dyas, and Eeth Koth. A total of six.

"And those opposed?" Glancing around again, he noted: Yoda, Ki-Adi-Mundi, Adi Gallia, Oppo Rancisis and Yaddle. Having counted only five, Mace frowned slightly and regarded the final Councilor. "Master Tiin, you have not chosen a position?"

At this, the generally quiet Master spoke calmly, "I had already determined that my vote would not matter. If I agreed, then the majority would be satisfied. If I opposed, we would defer to the subject's decision, which Obi-Wan has already given his consent, leading to the same conclusion. So you see, my decision is irrelevant."

"Then it is settled. I believe that the minimum of six will be sufficient enough."

"Masters," the Koyn stepped forward, "may I speak?"

"Of Course, Master Vylond." Yoda motioned for her to continue.

Boldly, she took a few more steps into the center of the room, to stand about a meter behind Obi-Wan. "As a Soul Healer, I have on occasion assisted some searching for answers on a journey through their own mind. In my experience I have discovered such a trek goes more smoothly when a soothing presence can be used as an anchor. I am here by the Council's request to strictly support Obi-Wan during this Tribunal. And while I may not be a Council Member, I would like to be there for Obi-Wan while the procedure is performed."

"Granted. The rest will consist of Yoda, myself, Master Tiin, Master Koon, and Master Piell."

"Decline I do. No part in this I wish to take." The ancient Master announced, shocking those around him.

Obi-Wan tried to hide his disappointment. He figured that of all those present, Yoda would be the best to uncover the truth of the matter. And while he appreciated Uvontra's suggestion, he was hoping to lean on the elder master for support as well. To lose that pillar of strength left doubts in his mind. Still, he had already conceded to back down now would cause suspicion.

Meanwhile, Mace recovered from his momentary shock and looked across the room, "Master Sifo-Dyas, as this was your suggestion, would you be willing?"

"Of course, Master," he responded immediately.

Surprisingly enough, the Iktotchi Councilor spoke for a second time, "While my telepathic abilities are superior to most, I do believe that I could project our progress to any who wish to witness it. They would not be able to take an active role, a mere observer, but it would allow more perspectives to consider our position. And it would not place additional stress on young Kenobi's mind. All they would need do is reach out with their mind to me when we begin."

"Thank you, Saesee." Mace then turned back to the pirate, his gaze softening just slightly. "Are you ready to proceed, Obi-Wan?"

The young man swallowed hard. He should not have been surprised that the Council would want to do this so soon, but he was. He thought they might have taken a break at least before this so he could prepare.

And then he realized he had no idea how he would prepare for the invasion of his mind. He had never experienced something like this before, so he had no idea what it would be like. What would be the point in putting it off?

So he took a deep breath and exhaled. "Yes."

Without missing a beat, the horned telepath said gently, "Obi-Wan, would you please turn and face me." As soon as their gazes met, he continued, "I will first connect my mind with you, then I will bring in Master Vylond for your support. One by one, I will bring in the others, so we will not overload your mind too quickly. When I have finished pulling everyone in, I will send out a quick message to allow those wishing to observe the chance to connect with my mind, not yours. Then we will begin the journey inward, pealing back the layers carefully. When we are finished, we shall retreat in the same way, building back the layers so you will be returned to your current state. Do you understand?"

Obi-Wan nodded. And within seconds he heard the master's voice from inside his head. "Thank you for sharing your mind with us. It is an intimate part of yourself that we are privileged to see. I will endeavor to make this process as easy on you as possible for the trust you are placing in us."

Without even realizing it, the bright Council chamber had faded around him. Now Obi-Wan found himself on the shores of Trosal hye, a lake by the village on Togoria where Obi-Wan often went to think or relax. The sun was setting. He loved how it painted the sky and how the surface of the lake would reflect it.

"It is a beautiful place, Obi-Wan," Uulia said as she walked up next to him. "A good place to begin this journey."

Glancing behind, the corsair watched in amazement as Saesee brought the others in. Each one started off as a hazy mass that would slowly take shape. In addition to their astral form, the young man began to feel a strange weight press upon his mind. It grew steadily until all six were present and then leveled off. He gathered it was the addition of their minds crowding in and putting pressure on him.

Uulia stayed close to him. "I am only here for you. There will be memories that you may not be ready to face yet. Do not hesitate to turn to me should you need any help."

Before Obi-Wan could respond, Tiin walked up to him, "Are you ready, young Kenobi?"

"I think so."

"Good. This should not be so difficult considering you have already told us much of what has happened. We will begin with recent events and go back through time. We will sift through memories quickly, only pausing to review anything we may question. Let us begin."

And suddenly the landscape shifted. It was like a huge vid recorder that was jostling backward, as one looked for a specific moment. When they allowed a memory to play, Obi-Wan found himself strangely detached from it. An odd sensation. The events on the _Zenah_ were difficult to watch considering how fresh they were. Worse were the numerous comments of anger he heard from the Masters. And he had to admit, he was angry – at so many things.

They did not dwell long. As they covered the many raids he took part in, they selected only a few to watch. They even reviewed the raid on the _Koska_, which brought some semblance of relief for Obi-Wan as he was able to see again everything that happened. How his senses had not fully betrayed him and that he had protected Tuuvu as only he could at that time. He was a little disappointed however when he noticed particularly happy moments whiz by with Tuuvu, Jorri, Liior, Mrrogh and so many others. It appeared to him that the Council was unconcerned about the good times.

In truth they were searching for something. Piell was correct about one thing. There was a part of Obi-Wan that was shrouded in hate, anger and fear. It was any hint of those emotions that caused them to linger in certain moments. Yet there was no significant source revealed during his time working with the pirates.

It was the diminutive Lannik that turned to Mace and Saesee saying, "Enough of this. I can see now that his accuracy in how he perceived the world around him during these events has been rather precise. However, this is not the only reason why we are here. We need to dig deeper. We need to find the Dark side."

The leading pair, did not respond directly. Instead the Councilors turned and looked at him with question in their eyes. Obi-Wan could sense their request for approval and automatically nodded his consent. It was partially the reason he allowed this Probe to occur. He wanted to know the truth just as much as they did. In an instant the images around them flashed by, scarcely able to be seen. It was so sudden and swift, that the corsair stepped back and bumped into Uvontra. She placed a steadying hand on his shoulder and he smiled up at her in gratitude.

None of the Jedi could discern what was happening in the memories. Only Obi-Wan was able to pick out quick images and place them in his life. He caught a glimpse of his first meeting with Liior. That was during his recovery on Togoria, which could only mean the darker times were coming. He was about to warn them when everything stopped abruptly and cast them in a blanket of night. It was such a jolt that everyone found themselves gasping on the ground. Despite this being only a projection of their true selves, the echoes of reality still dwell in the mind.

"What's happened?" Mace demanded as he regained his footing.

Obi-Wan answered softly, "I don't know." He managed to get up on his hands and knees. He felt the Koyn touch his shoulder, quietly asking if he was all right. He touched her hand for reassurance.

Saesee was able to clarify, "There is a barrier. A strong one at that."

"A barrier? How?" Plo Koon asked.

Before anyone else could comment on the matter, a faint light began to illuminate the pitch. It came from just a few meters ahead, a hazy mass that focused into definite form. It was an odd thing to see. It looked like a small corner made of metal. A lump of dirty rags huddled in the corner.

"What is this?" Sifo-Dyas demanded.

"It can't be," a trembling whisper uttered. The Jedi looked at Obi-Wan, still kneeling with Uvontra behind.

"What is it Obi-Wan? Where are we?" She encouraged the young man tenderly. The pile of filthy linen stirred slightly, drawing their attention again.

His eyes stung and his throat constricted. He could barely believe what he was seeing. With a voice forced from its confines, he wondered aloud, "Could that really be… _me_?"

"What do you mean, you?"

He swallowed hard, forcing his throat to obey him. "That's – that's the corner of Drrov's office where he kept me bound most of the time. But I…never…"

The arrival of visitors and their voices woke the curled up form. Carefully, it worked to turn itself over to face them. A boy that looked so young stared at them with sad sea-change eyes under a disheveled shock of matted ginger hair. The battered and beaten body was smudged with blood and filth. Ragged bits of clothing scantly covered the skinny child. You could see joints and bones clearly, but there was enough muscle left to show how toned they were. They could hear the chain that bound the collar around the boy's neck to the wall behind as he moved. The child seemed to recognize them and struggled to say, "You don't belong here. You have to leave."

Opposite the boy a young man continued to ponder, "Is that really me? Is that what I looked like back then? I never saw… Force…"

"You need to get out of here. You can't stay here." The younger Obi-Wan urged.

"Why?" Mace demanded. "Why must we go?" And then they felt it.

"It is there." Piell said aloud what they all could feel. "The darkness, it is beyond that barrier."

It was like a poison cloud that seeped its way to them. Any sane being would run for their lives, but the Councilors had seen enough to stand their ground. A slight glistening could be seen flickering in the shadow. Tiny bits of light reflecting off shiny fur as black as the world around it. Menacing gold eyes opened, watching the Jedi's every move. Slowly the creature moved forward, to reveal the large dark Togorian, just as Obi-Wan had seen him for the first time on the _Monument_.

"Drrov," escaped from the corsair.

The creature grinned, that appeared more like a snarl, at his name. He announced in a deep, booming voice, "The boy is mine. You cannot have him."

"How can Drrov be here?" Master Poof asked. "He was killed almost five years ago, according to our reports."

"A Shadowmark it is." Yoda said as he materialized.

"A what?"

"A Shadowmark. An ancient technique utilized by the Sith."

"What does it do?"

"Part of the consciousness implanted it is. A way to control its victims it can be."

"Then we will destroy it!" Even Piell growled as he prepared to charge.

"No!" Yoda held him back with his gimmer stick. "Destroy it we cannot. Seriously injure Obi-Wan's mind we would. Kill him we might. Delicate the situation is."

"Is this why you did not approve of the Probe?" Mace asked his old friend. A low grunt of affirmation was his response.

Master Piell was not pleased with the turn of events and demanded to know, "Then how do we get past the barrier?"

"We do not." The tiny green creature said. A light thud as his gimmer stick was placed before him accentuated his point. His gaze turned to the pair that still sat on the ground.

Obi-Wan looked up under the weight of the gaze and immediately understood what the Master was implying. He fell back and tried to scramble away only to crash into the Soul Healer. Shaking his head, he told the tiny Master, "No, I can't. He's too strong. It already takes everything I have to stop him from roaming free. There's no way I could defeat him."

Sadly, the Master replied, "Then already won he has."

A foul, rolling cackle drew their attention back to the Togorian. "That's right little pet, cower like the pathetic creature you are. Look, look at who you really are." The dark being strode over to the corner where a much younger Obi-Wan backed away. But Drrov enjoyed the boy's fear and it spurred him on. Grabbing a tuft of hair, he yanked the boy from his corner and flung him down in front of older Obi-Wan. "You are nothing!" His great foot pushed his prey into the ground. With malice, he released his claws and dug them deep into the boy's back, making him cry out.

The corsair felt the burn in his back as the claws burrowed into his skin. He fell to the ground whimpering. He knew how much Drrov loved to hear him scream. And he refused to give him the satisfaction.

"Fight him you will. Fight him you must." The sage commanded.

"But how?"

"Yes, little Jedi, how do you plan to stop me?" Drrov mocked them from his protected sanctuary. "How can any of you stop me? He is my toy, my pet, my _Bauudi_." And he laughed as he shifted his paw back, shredding the boy's back.

A muffled grunt of agony sounded from the older Obi-Wan as his body blazed with new pain. He looked at Yoda with begging eyes, "please, make it stop."

"No, only you can do that." Yoda came and knelt in front of Obi-Wan. Softly, he explained, "His strength from you it comes. Binds you with his words. The fear he has forged in you. That is his power. That is his control. If give into your fears you do, then never will your chains be broken. Forever his slave you will be. Forever a servant of the Dark side."

The horror of such a revelation overpowered the pain momentarily. It was a moment of clarity and the young man knew that the time had come. He had told Qui-Gon that he was tired of running and hiding from his past. He knew now that that included Drrov as well. Carefully, slowly, he pushed himself up and leaned back on his haunches. Eye level with the Master, he asked, "What must I do?"

"Only you the barrier can breach. Only you must face Drrov. Remember his strength is your strength. Battle it is not just of survival but of soul and mind as well. Not be far we will, however help you we cannot. Be wary of the choices you make. Or else this battle may be your last." He turned to the other Councilors now. "Fall back we will, but retreat fully we will not. Be ready for any outcome we must." And with that the Masters slowly stepped back, fading into the night.

Master Uvontra was the last to leave. She squeezed his shoulder one more time. "Have faith in the love of your friends and family. Believe in yourself as they believe in you." And then she was gone too. Leaving him alone to face his worst nightmare.

- SW – SW – SW –

Well, hope that was interesting! See you all on the 15th! Thanks again for reading!

~Ari :D


	7. Demon in the Dark

I love western time, it keeps me on track even when I miss EST cut off. ;) Although, I must admit, I'm starting to get tired of the Thunderstorms. I mean, do we need them every single day during the summer? Anyway, had to drop off my normal comp today to get fixed up. It caught a mean ol virus. :( Lucky I had my lappy. Yeah! Shall we do this thing now, or what?

K-rock – Still, Good luck in Cali! And safe trip! Thanks, I enjoyed writing these chapters. And I love writing emotion too. It really is the core of angst. And Angst is just music to my ears. ;) Hope you like it. :D

Now, on with the show!

- SW – SW – SW – SW -

Chapter 7: Demon in the Dark

_Come, taste the nectar of Darkness_

_Feel, the seduction of her caress_

_Power, unlike which you may never know_

_Falling, black like a demon snow_

_See, how you are already lost_

_Know, that each step comes with a cost_

_Fail, because that's the path that you sow_

_Falling, black like a demon snow_

"You're alone, boy. Your so called friends have abandoned you once again." The mocking laughter that haunted his nights rang loudly in his mind. "The only thing your Jedi have been good at is throwing away its children."

Obi-Wan didn't bother arguing with the Togorian. That creature knew how to lash out with words, words that could torment you if you let them. And that is what Obi-Wan had to focus on. The words stung. But he was older now and he did not have to let them hurt him any more. He stared at gold eyes, terrified that they would burn through his soul. And he wondered again if he would ever be able to defeat this monster.

Drrov chuckled at the young man's inability to act. "Come, come, little pet. Or are you afraid of my power?"

"Your power is limited, Drrov. You cannot even get beyond this barrier."

At the challenge, the dead Captain snarled, "True, I may be confined in this space, but I have more than enough power to deal with you." He reached down and grabbed younger Obi around the neck. Holding him thus, he slammed him against the barrier in front of older Obi-Wan, making him step back at the impact. "I don't need to control your whole mind. Just a part of you will do." With his free hand, Drrov grabbed the slave's arm and twisted it behind his back. Then in a vice-like grip proceeded to crush the bones of the frail forearm.

Hearing his younger self scream at the agony, Obi-Wan grit his teeth. The pain of his arm burned through him, forcing him to his knees, cradling the limb.

"You see," he heard the booming voice of his tormentor, "I have the child you are grown from. The weak, pathetic little wretch that lies in your core. Worthless, not just to yourself but the galaxy as well. Even your Force knew what little value you offered. It knew it would take someone like me to get anything out of your useless hide."

"That's not true," the corsair argued weakly, "Force, please don't let that be true."

"You know it is, Bauudi. That's why you can't face me now. Because if you really looked at yourself through my eyes, you know you would see it too."

"No, you lie."

"Lie? Why lie when the truth is so much more _painful._" The former Captain leaned in close to the child he still held, whispering "Isn't that right boy?" as he cut a line down young Obi-Wan's cheek with his claw.

"Coward!" The corsair shouted. "You're nothing but a coward. All you know how to do is terrorize a child. You wouldn't do half as well with a real man."

A menacing chuckle resounded. "Show me a real man, since I _know_ you can't be talking about yourself, and you'll see what I can do. And who's the real coward? You hide still on your side of the barrier knowing that I can't fully reach you. Of course, watching you writhe in pain is enjoyable no matter what side you're on." And he laughed as he drew on the dark power and sent waves of electric fire through both bodies.

***

The Jedi Council remained linked through Saesee Tiin at the very fringes of Obi-Wan's mind, bearing witness to the battle that had only just begun. They had withdrawn enough that the world around them no longer resembled the landscape of the pirate's memory but the Chamber they knew so well.

Qui-Gon stood at the perimeter of the Council, furious that things had spiraled so far out of control. "We cannot just leave him to fight this on his own. He has not been prepared for such a struggle. He has only just recovered from his injuries."

"Fight his battle, we cannot." The venerable Master responded. "Prepared for it he may not have been but succeed now he must or forever will he be under Drrov's control."

"How can he defeat Drrov when he has struggled so long with those memories and lost?"

"Because should Obi-Wan fail, a servant of the Dark side he would become, under Drrov's command."

A pregnant silence fell over the chamber at the foreboding such a statement brought. It was after such a pause that Master Sifo-Dyas felt compelled to ask, "Master Yoda, this Shadowmark, you said it was a Dark side power, but how and why would the Sith utilize such a power?"

This time it was Oppo Rancisis who would answer the question, "I have heard of such an ability in my research. Often Sith would have slaves and enemies with them. Their slaves they could control through a Shadowmark so that they could root out any who would wish to fight their captors. Despite how badly their Sith Lords would treat their slaves, the Shadowmark would prevent them from striking down their Masters as well. A well-constructed Shadowmark could even make a slave protect their Master. There have even been some cases in which enemies were released only to betray their compatriots because of the Shadowmark."

The others considered the Thisspiasian's words. Oppo added with a hint of trepidation, "The skill needed to create such a shadow must be great as the being needed to deposit a piece of his own will in the mind of another. This would only be possible when the subject's mental shields were broken down. For Drrov to have seeded Obi-Wan's mind so well, he must have had a strong connection with the Dark side of the Force."

"Even more troubling, how and where would Drrov have learned such a skill?" Yoda pondered sadly.

The question would remain unanswered as their attention was drawn back to the center of the room. A guttural moan escaped the young pirate's throat as he fell to his knees. Automatically, Qui-Gon and Uvontra rushed to his side. But before they could reach him Yoda commanded, "No! Touch him you must not."

"Master?" Uvontra asked via the one word why they could not.

"Pull him from his mind it would. Save him from Drrov's clutches for now. Stronger Drrov would become as weaker Obi-Wan would get. Fail him again we would."

"So we are to stand here and do nothing as Obi-Wan is tortured by that beast once more?" Qui-Gon practically growled the question at his superiors.

They ignored his tone, understanding and feeling the frustration as well. Mace tried to calm his friend, "We do understand how you feel. We feel just as helpless. But the only thing we can do now is wait for Obi-Wan to conquer his past. If it has plagued him for this long, then it is time for him to break free of it."

"Can you not see what is happening? He is not ready for one of your trials!"

"So certain are you that he will fail?" Yoda rested his chin atop his hands and gimmer stick. "Such little faith in Obi-Wan's abilities you have?"

Qui-Gon reeled back from the questions. It was not his intention to diminish Obi-Wan's capabilities when he had been trying so hard to show that the boy could still be a Jedi. However, Yoda would not have asked him those questions unless he wanted to make a point of some kind. It would be up to Qui-Gon to figure out exactly what that point was.

***

Obi-Wan lay there gasping as Drrov laughed at him. _How could I defeat someone so strong?_ He wondered. His head lolled to the side as he tried to gather strength and he caught sight of his younger self. Drrov had dropped the boy after he had finished his attack. Obi-Wan stared into his own pain-filled eyes. It was the most heart wrenching sight he had ever seen. There was a deep sense of hopelessness that begged for release in those turquoise gems. A sudden, desperate urge swept over him to save this child, no matter the cost.

Without realizing it, his hand reached out to comfort the boy. He watched as it touched the barrier and created ripples as if he had just touched the surface of a still pool. It was devoid of any warmth, any feeling. But he would not be deterred; he had to let that boy know he was no longer alone. With very little effort, he was able to push past the barrier.

Seeing this, the boy stretched out his bony hand eagerly. He had been deprived of another's touch for so long, he wanted to feel another without pain following. The two hands met and fingers intertwined immediately.

What happened next took them all off guard. Older Obi-Wan felt himself move without moving. A consciousness crashed into his own, feeling strange yet familiar all at the same time. His outstretched hand now held nothing. He stared at that hand. He knew it was his but it looked different now. Smaller, thinner, younger. Not bony like the boy's, but not as healthy as his had been. Slowly, he drew it closer and placed it on the ground. Painfully, he pushed himself up. It took more energy than he thought it should. He could sense a weakness in his body that he had not felt in a long time.

His befuddled mind took in his surroundings little by little. He was on the other side of the barrier. The boy, his younger self, had completely vanished. And he realized the vile cackle of his captor had stopped. In fact, he could now hear a low growl that built to a crescendo. The roar rang loudly in his ear and he suddenly felt a large clawed paw grab his hair. He reached up to pry off the thick fingers, to no avail.

It was obvious that Drrov was not happy. His toy and the pirate merged in the blink of an eye. The object of his control was stolen from him. The Togorian lunged for this new version of Obi-Wan with a snarl and grabbed the boy's head. Fury gave the feline creature strength and he flung Obi-Wan into the corner. "Don't think you can save yourself with Jedi trickery! You are still mine, Bauudi!"

Landing with a thud, Obi-Wan attempted to recover. Unfortunately, Drrov proved to be quicker. The Captain grabbed the youth's neck and shoved the corsair's face into the ground. "Remember? Remember how I would let you wallow in your own filth for days? Only when I couldn't stand the smell of you any more would I hose you down. Do you remember how I controlled your food and water? How I would make you beg for it? Oh, you may have fought in the beginning, but in the end you would do whatever I told you."

Drrov enjoyed forcing such humiliating memories on the boy. He knew how much Obi-Wan hated him self during that time because of what the Togorian had made him do. The Captain laughed maniacally. "Should I bring up the memories of your beatings? Not just by me too. You were such a convenient target, how could I deny my crew the chance to take out their frustrations on you."

With all of his strength, Obi-Wan managed to wriggle free. He pressed himself against the wall and kicked out with his leg catching the dark furry being in the chest, knocking him back. "You can keep _your_ memories Drrov. Mine are in the past." Struggling to his feet, Obi-Wan wanted to put some distance between himself and that monster.

Anger raged in the Togorian. Never had his toy bothered to fight back in his sanctuary. How dare this new Obi-Wan strike back at him? He pounced and backhanded the retreating youth, sending Obi spinning back to the floor. The slave tried to scramble away but Drrov would not allow it.

Claws gripped ginger strands once more, pulling the boy back into his grasp. "Where do you think you're going, pet? You're in my realm. You are nothing but a scag here." Taking a fistful of tunic, the Captain tossed the boy into a new memory. "I know, the fights," he hissed. He took a step toward the boy as he spoke, "What was your favourite part? The waiting? The anticipation? Oh, the killing? Watching others die for your survival?"

Obi-Wan was getting tired of the man's goading. Pulling himself up, he calculated his possibilities. With little option and his frustration building from the constant taunting, the corsair charged his opponent. He collided with a firm abdomen, swinging wildly.

This futile effort seemed to amuse Drrov. He laughed. Then he brought his fists down on the boy's shoulders driving him to his knees. He snatched up the corsair's arm and yanked him back to his feet. He quickly spun Obi around and caught the other arm. Twisting the arms behind the youth's back, he held both wrists in one giant paw. With his free hand, he slammed his disobedient slaves head into a stone railing that overlooked an arena.

Obi-Wan was dazed by the impact. He was in an awkward position. Bent over, arms pinned behind his back and the railing keeping him up, Obi found it hard to gain any footing. The paw that pressed the side of his head into the rough stone released. He struggled to break free only to freeze a moment later.

"Or perhaps it was the gamblers who came to bet on the fights? In your little cage, they would come to gawk at you. But I think it was their ability to poke, prod and fondle you if they wished you liked so much." The paw slid over the youth's body slowly.

Obi-Wan had to fight the urge to vomit. He could feel the bile rising in his throat. "Was it not those memories that got you tossed into the Sensory Deprivation Cell at Ashua upon entry? They stripped you. They put their hands on you, assessing you." He choked back a sob.

"The collar. I couldn't stop the memories." The child offered the meager excuse.

Drrov didn't care about excuses. He wanted leverage. He wanted his toy back and he would use everything to get it back. "The beating you got for fighting them was justified. Only creatures with rights are treated with dignity. But you have no rights because you are nothing."

Leaning in closer, Drrov continued to attack. "And those boys you fought as soon as you got out of SDC, did you enjoy beating them? Did they know that your killer instinct was too strong? You tried to fight that too in the beginning. How futile? Do you remember that boy you tried to save with your pathetic Jedi morals? Would you like to see how they tortured you? How they tore that boy to shreds because you weren't able to kill him yourself?"

A piercing scream echoed through his mind. It was not his own cry but the boy Drrov spoke of. He never knew the boy's name. He had tried to save him. But it only brought the boy's hatred down upon him. "Watch! Watch as they took him apart piece by piece."

"Stop it! Stop it!" he begged.

The Togorian kicked at the back of his prey's knees, forcing the boy flush against the wall. Obi-Wan put his hands up to push away only to be stopped by the Captain's leg digging between his shoulder blades, pinning him there. "How about the time you killed the last muiranohx? It may have only been a wild creature but it had survived a long time in the arena, but you managed to kill it, the very last of its species."

***

Soft grunts, gasps of air and hisses of pain peppered the silence of the Council Chamber periodically. The waiting tested the patience of everyone in the room.

As Qui-Gon pondered Yoda's questions, he searched within himself. Had he really doubted Obi-Wan? All Qui could remember since finding the young man was promoting Obi-Wan's chance to be a Jedi again. How the Force had brought them together. He carefully examined himself from the point of discovery to the moment he was in currently. Looking at each minute for his true thoughts and feelings.

It took him some time, but the Knight finally began to understand what Yoda had been trying to say. Five years ago, he had made a mistake. Obi-Wan was right on the _Zenah_; he had seen the boy as a means of redeeming himself, not Obi-Wan. He had been denying the truth from the beginning. If he truly cared about the wayward student he would not have forced him to return. He would have given Obi-Wan the chance to make his own decision, chose his own destiny. Not the one Qui-Gon had chosen for him. He had desperately wanted to show the Council that he should be given the chance to correct his mistake and make the boy a great Jedi.

He had not thought about the consequences to Obi-Wan. He had only considered himself. How he could redeem himself. The Knight had protested the Probe not because of Obi-Wan's well being, although he used it as a veil, but because he had not had a chance to teach the boy. To show him the ways of the Force and pass along all his teachings before he would face the Trials of the Council. To prove he could take a pirate and fashion him into the Jedi he thought Obi-Wan should be. He wanted to show how Obi-Wan would be capable of anything because of Qui-Gon's presence.

And by his actions he had only proven that he did not believe in or consider the boy to be anything more than a means of his liberation of the past. Even his actions against Ashua had been a blind attempt to get the boy back under his wing. To show that only he could save the boy from the horrors he was unable to prevent. It had all been about Qui-Gon Jinn, not Obi-Wan Kenobi.

And now his thoughts drifted to the young man who stood on the edge of a precipice. One, who despite his desire to remain hidden, willingly followed Qui-Gon back to Coruscant. To be tried and tested, mocked and ridiculed by those who didn't understand. Willingly accepted what fate had in store. And the battle he had to win.

The emotions rolling off the pirate came in thick waves. He could not see the young man's face, but he suddenly sensed great concentration coming from Obi-Wan.

***

Obi-Wan did recall that fight, only not at all the way Drrov had seen it.

The muiranohx's name was Pi'lahmind Trysjhis, he was 248 cycles old. He had over 30 mates with over 180 direct offspring. When a mining crew had come to survey the land they believed his people to be a threat to their workers and proceeded to slaughter them. They could not hear the voices of his clans. The muiranohx spoke through the Force, not with their mouths. They had no technology to protect themselves and the colonizers thought them stupid beasts. In a matter of a cycle, his people were on the brink of extinction. The last few were shipped off world and he could only guess what happened to them. Pi'lahmind fought ferociously despite his desire to join his clan in the Force because he refused to lay down and die for the sake of dying.

They believed one could only join the Force if one died a valiant death against a worthy opponent. Thus far he had found none who could fulfill his final battle. That is, until Obi-Wan. He had not encountered another with a connection to the Force until that moment. Pi'lahmind questioned Obi-Wan about it at first. The boy told him of the Jedi and the ways of the Force and the good they represented. It was then that the creature determined his time had come to an end. What the muiranohx said that day, Obi-Wan never forget.

"Noble Kenobi, who speaks by the grace of Nalial, you are a worthy opponent. I will fight you with all of my strength. In the end you will be victorious. Not just here and now, but in the days to come. Nalial has a greater destiny waiting for you. At all costs you must survive. Draw strength from Nalial when you need her and she will answer." Obi-Wan was about to protest. He did not want to kill, especially the last of its kind.

"Dry your tears, child of Nalial, for we are all her children. She has called me home and I will finally be reunited with those I have longed for. Your journey is dawning, while mine has reached its sunset."

The fight that followed was the hardest Obi-Wan fought in all his time in the arena. Pi'lahmind was old and tired and ready to die. Yet he had fought with honour, and grace, and power. When it came time for the final blow, Pi'lahmind looked up into Obi-Wan's eyes and said, "Thank you." The boy couldn't help but cry as he struck.

"Do you know that was one of your best fights?" Drrov teased, pulling Obi-Wan back from his own memory into Drrov's. "You must have enjoyed that kill because you no longer hesitated after that. You made me a lot of credits. You finally proved you had some value."

That wasn't why he did it. The slave had only fought and won because Pi'lahmind told him so. The muiranohx called him worthy, told him he had value beyond this arena, beyond Drrov's grasp. So he fought not for himself, but for the Force, for Nalial. So he vowed to survive these fights, release his opponents the only way he could. He might not have been able to free himself, but he would not die no matter how much he longed for it.

That is when he felt the power surge within him. He focused on it, drawing it near. And when it filled every molecule of his body, he released its energy.

The force of the blast sent Drrov sprawling. The dark creature was not expecting it so he caught the brunt of it full on. Snarling his rage, the Togorian flipped over and got up on his hands and feet. He glared over his shoulder at the object of his hatred.

The scenery had vanished around them. The only things that remained were Drrov and Obi-Wan. The boy looked a little older than before. The flowing ginger strands seemed to flutter on a light breeze. But it was the boy's eyes that startled the Captain most. In them he could see a clarity and determination he had never seen before.

Obi-Wan stood tall, returning Drrov's glare. His arms rested at his sides while his hands curled into fists. Cultured tones announced calmly and firmly, "No more, Drrov. I am yours _no more_."

- SW – SW – SW – SW –

That's right Obi! You tell him! Well, that's it for now. See you all on the 28th. And as always, Thanks for reading!

~Ari :D


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